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blankseplocked Bosena: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Self-Destruct
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Fairlight Corp
Rooks and Kings
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:31:00 - [1]

Disclaimer: This battle involves only a few capital deaths and is featured here as a lesson in how not to use that flashing red 'emergency' button near the Captain's chair on your spaceship.


Those cutlass wielded, rump-slapping types:

Beyond Divinity Inc. and Nocturnal Legion, both pirate corps, camp low sec systems in Molden Heath. To their credit, they are well scouted in all directions against incoming fleets.

As is often the case, they were camping a high-sec gate in Bosena (a 0.4).

Those upstanding gentleman, do-gooders and the like:

Foundati0n FDN) often drop cyno's onto the campers, leading to inevitable hate threads, especially from Beyond Divnity. This happened the day before this fight too, where four BYDI battleships were killed by Mythral's Nyx + a few carriers.

The Fight:

Although usually scanning for a cyno trap, it seems the hostiles were lax this time and engaged VikingBjorn's Abaddon on the Teonusude gate, with several battleships.

Having tackled one of the battleships, Viking cyno'd in two capitals, who killed a Dominix. They weren't pilots who'd hotdropped on the enemy before and we hoped this would pose the question as to whether they had support.

Station Scout: "They're undocking, lots of support battleships and at least 3 carriers".

This in itself wasn't remarkable - we expected that they were trying to lure us over for a scrap on station. Wanting to bring them to the gate, Valdor (FC) instructed the carrier pilots to linger on the gate as nonchalantly as possible.

Station Scout: "They're aligning.. they're warping in".

Valdor (FC - deep South African baritone): "Bloody excellent. Jump, jump, jump!"

At this point another cyno goes down, more FDN carriers jump in and the main gang starts advancing from two jumps away.

Nocturnal Legion/Beyond Divinity start massing forces as well but after a few minutes it becomes clear that FDN has the upper hand and that the three hostile carriers are stuck on the gate. Nonetheless, Nocturnal Legion do their best to use Falcons to try and extricate them. The FDN carriers are packing ECCM to make this difficult but it's still a generally effective tactic.

On Board Lord Kesh's carrier (reconstruction):

Cute female Lieutenant: FDN have too many caps here. The battle goes ill!

Unnamed Corporal, sporting a suspicious moustache: Goes ill? Like a rosy-cheeked schoolboy skiiving school so he can have a thermometer up his posterior? No, we're in the stickiest situation since sticky the stick insect got stuck on a sticky bun.

Lord Kesh: Damn their eyes. All carriers initiate self-destruct. Private Baldric, bring me a final cup of tea.

(Kesh reaches and hits a button on his command chair which starts flashing red).

22:50:17 Notify Lord KesH has initiated self-destruct of their Nidhoggur, it will explode in 120 seconds.

Baldric: I'll just place it here, m'Lord.

The Fight Continues:

Lord Kesh is called prime but with his Nidhoggur in structure and the FDN fleet warping in, the Falcons suddenly strike gold, scram breaks and - already aligned to station - he warps to safety!

The fleet arrives and triples scram on the remaining carriers.

Vilrath's Thanatos (Beyond Divinity) completes its self-destruct countdown and dies:

22:54:05 Notify Thanatos belonging to Villwrath self-destructs: Villwrath falls on his sword

Angst's Chimera (Nocturnal Legion) is destroyed before the self-destruct can finish.

As Meat Loaf would tell us, Two Out of Three Ain't Bad.

Station Scout: "The Nidhuggur, Lord Kesh, is back at station. But, umm, hold on a second here..."

Fairlight Corp
Rooks and Kings
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:32:00 - [2]

On Board Lord Kesh's carrier (reconstruction):

Cute female Lieutenent: Oh, Sir, it's marvellous. We've escaped! We're back at the station, in dock range.

Lord Kesh: Well, it was deserved really. The Falcons did a fine job.

(Kesh picks up his cup of tea)

Lord Kesh: Yes, two foes met on the field, did battle...

(Kesh suddenly sees where the cup of tea was standing)

Lord Kesh: OH S-


gf to all, thanks for bringing the fight & Kesh will be back ganking people in no time. Though I'll keep a seat on the roflcopter for some of the smackier members of the Bosena crowd, just in case.

Cutting Edge Incorporated
RAZOR Alliance
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:37:00 - [3]

Thanks for a well written report and always enjoyable when a self destruct backfires. Laughing

Captain Shocker
Deep Core Mining Inc.
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:39:00 - [4]

Actually made me chuckle outloud. well-done

Electus Matari
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:40:00 - [5]

Very Happy

Well done FDN


Cutting Edge Incorporated
RAZOR Alliance
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:41:00 - [6]

Nice read Very Happy

Imperial Crusade Extremists.
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:45:00 - [7]

Edited by: VoYvod on 09/06/2008 08:44:52
he self destructed on the station? LaughingLaughingLaughingwell deserved for being lame... LaughingLaughingLaughing

nice write up

Celestial Apocalypse
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:54:00 - [8]

Great post!

Warped Mining
Strip Mining Club
Posted - 2008.06.09 08:55:00 - [9]

Haha, nice, and fun read too :D

Ab Origines
White Noise.
Posted - 2008.06.09 09:00:00 - [10]

nice read, thx Laughing

DiaBlo UK
Posted - 2008.06.09 09:26:00 - [11]

great post.
more threads like these!

Arx Io Orbital Factories
Arx Io
Posted - 2008.06.09 09:48:00 - [12]


People that self destructs are wussies.

pc dude
Ghosts of Ragnarok
Test Alliance Please Ignore
Posted - 2008.06.09 09:59:00 - [13]

10 / 10. could be my favorite read on caod so far

Ask Unbeatable
Krazny Oktyabr Revolyutsiya
Posted - 2008.06.09 10:03:00 - [14]


Defias Taskmaster
The Defias Brotherhood
Posted - 2008.06.09 10:14:00 - [15]

FDN still gets no respect... SCARY just lost a lot.

Posted - 2008.06.09 10:26:00 - [16]

Man, what happened to BDYI they used to be good. Foundation ofc always a classy bunch, as Hannibal from the A-team would say "I love it when a plan comes together".

Dr Cupid
the united
Negative Ten.
Posted - 2008.06.09 10:46:00 - [17]

"Lord Kesh: OH Sh**!" = GOLD!


Jelena Jinx
Northen Breeze
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:01:00 - [18]

Good read :P even tho i dont care what side lost and won :P

Rionnag Alba
Northern Coalition.
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:05:00 - [19]

Originally by: Alazais
Valdor (FC) instructed the carrier pilots to linger on the gate as nonchalantly as possible.

lol, how does that work then?

David Goodwill
Goonswarm Federation
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:10:00 - [20]

This is how all battle reports should be.

Fitz Chivalry
Vengeance Imperium
Wildly Inappropriate.
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:12:00 - [21]

Originally by: Kaar
Originally by: Alazais
Valdor (FC) instructed the carrier pilots to linger on the gate as nonchalantly as possible.

lol, how does that work then?

You just tell them to list lazily to the left.

Good report, and lol at self-destruct gone wrong.

eito sec'undo
Mortis Angelus
The Church.
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:24:00 - [22]


Lord KesH
Incarnation of Evil
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:41:00 - [23]

Just to give my side of the story :)

1. Sorry for the smack in local afterwards, but you know we cant help it when its you ^^

2. The whole carrier thing was a quite funny story ^^ And here is what actually happened. (from our point of view)

We were sitting at a gate being nice and sweet like we usually are. Killing the odd ship now and then. Suddently a FDN Abaddon? i think it was jumped in, and we started shooting, bumping and what everyone knows you need to do to kill something.
Anyways, he pops a cyno (not unexpected form FDN) and in comes 2 carriers, so here we were thinking, "could this be the day that fdn comes in to fight us in a fair fight" Well more or less we decided that while we were taking gate gun fire and so on we could just as well warp in a few carriers to match theirs - ok we had 1 more than you that actually made it to the gate.

Never the less we pop the abaddon fairly fast. But then the thing happens - up goes a new cyno. But oh wait the new cyno ship is a carrier. We know we cant pop that in time before we get jumped so at this point everyone is aligned out.
Hello there 5 more carries to help FDN.
We get some/most of the ships out and the falcons stay behind to help get the carriers out.

So here i am with something like 3 points and 2 webs on me thinking this is not gonna work out. Then the second part of their fleet comes in. And we agree that we know that we are gonna loose our carriers. So we iniciate self destruct :)

Then here is the part i found a bit funny - Somehow 2 of the carries looses lock on me and im sitting at 20% Armor - "Not structure btw" :) - And the falcons do a great job of jamming the last one that has a point on me, so i warp out. so as you all know that about 1 minute and 50 seconds before i warp out the self destruct was initiated. So im in a bit of panic when i cant find the Self destruct thing while im in warp. Then im told that its not accessible while in warp and im thinking this is NOT good.
I land on the station and as soon as my ship is out of warp im trying to abort the self destruct. But nope that wasnt the case - my ship blows up as i land on station and im in my pod.

So all in all it was a fun fight, allthou we lost some ships which everyone does in the game. Outnumbered again but you must give us credit for trying ^^

Ships involved in the fight. (Taken from battlesummary from FDN killboard - as our is messed up because we had kills before fdn came)
We had/They had

Carriers: 3 - 7
BS : 4 - 10
CS : 0 - 1
BC : 1 - 4
HICS : 1 - 2
Hacs : 1 - 1
Recons : 2 - 3
Smallish: 0 - 2

Summary: gf guys - we will be seeing you around ^^

Souvera Corvus
Session Changes
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:43:00 - [24]

Edited by: Souvera Corvus on 09/06/2008 11:44:55
Now this explains some of the smack we were getting from BYDI tonight. None of it very good, not up to their usual standard and it had the dubious distinction of being done from a station.

I did wonder Rolling Eyes

Heard the post-fight smack was a bit OTT on both sides but self-destruct doesn't sit well.

Where is that button anyway?

darkin here
Imperial Shipment
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:48:00 - [25]

lulz at pirate scum getting their comeuppance.

While I would say this is what ******s who SD to avoid being killed have coming to them, are you sure it WAS a SD and not Candleja-

Pandorum Invictus
Posted - 2008.06.09 11:51:00 - [26]

Congrats ! Good writing Very Happy

Snuff Box
Posted - 2008.06.09 12:14:00 - [27]

Well. Was not there, to bad we lost the carriers. Well, we go on & keep on killing. We are not stoppable...

SilKKZ the3rd
Posted - 2008.06.09 12:16:00 - [28]

Honestly who puts a cyno on a carrier oh well we will get you next time :P

Zulu Six
State War Academy
Posted - 2008.06.09 12:26:00 - [29]

*snip* Posting with an unidentified character and characters in NPC corporations in this forum is prohibited. If you wish to participate in the discussions here, be sure to have your corporation and or alliance status ticked in your forum settings. ~Saint

Goonswarm Federation
Posted - 2008.06.09 12:28:00 - [30]

Something that's been bothering me for a long time, and I've never gotten a straight answer to.

Why do you pubbies self destruct or eject from your ships when you're going to die?

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