Written during the last downtime. Big thanks to Scrapheap Challenge
for inspiration and test audience.
D2 and friends:
You have a cow. All your neighbours have a cow, too. You agree not to steal each other's milk. Everybody else thinks that's weak.
(click on the bloody link)
You have a cow. You give milk to the mayor. He uses it to raise a gigantic golden calf. Everybody is in awe of it. Mayor locks it in the stable. One day he takes it out, leaves it tied to a tree, then an Indian warparty kills it.
You have a cow. Cowboys steal it. Sheriff gets it back from them, doesn't return it to you but hires you as a stable boy. Job sucks, so you start moonlighting as a cowboy.
You have a herd. It gets stolen and all there's left is a horn. Using complex science, you clone it to a bull and a cow and raise a new herd.
Nice cow, we'll take it.
You had a cow, but cattle-rustling is more fun.
You raise cows during the day and raid cattle during the night. You barely break even.
You're lucky. You've been born as a service bull. You inseminate cows all day in exchange for huge wads of money. You complain it's a hard life, but everybody says you're just bull****ting.