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blankseplocked Why am I in my pod?!! Chronicles of the carebear suicide gankee.
 
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Ashanta Shaanzera
Imba Industries
Posted - 2011.07.28 22:45:00 - [1]
 

So here's a sad, funny story I thought I'd never be able to tell.

I'm a carebear. A 25-million SP noob. Real-life hasn't allowed me the luxury of immersing myself in all of the nerve-wracking 0.0 stuff EVE has to offer. So I ended up an industry boff doing some invention, some T2 manufacturing, some trading, some PI nonsense and the like. Anything that makes money, even if it is the slow-but-sure kind.

Earlier tonight I got in my trusty Mammoth, did some maintenance and contracts and PI-ferrying and jobs. And then I thought, heck, let me go sell some of these Wetware Mainframes I've been producing the past three weeks. Hmmmm, yeah, let's throw in these Hulk BPCs I've invented as well, while we're at it... its not like I need them all!
I gather up the goods, and off we go. I'm 4 jumps away from Jita. About ISK400 mil worth of stuff in my cargohold.

Now there are few things I hate more than staring at a ship waiting to go into warp mode. "Warp drive... wait for it... WAIT FOR IT............active!"... (yawn) So as soon as I enter The Forge I open up my market browser and start putting in several buy orders for raw materials for the Hulks I'll churn out next week. I'm happily grafting away doing all kinds of carebear nonsense, Excel open on my other monitor, sending my cash to work while I warp and jump and warp and jump on the overview pane without worrying too much the details of my surroundings. I mean, this is hi-sec, right?

I arrive in Jita 4/4 ready to contract all these blueprints and sell three weeks' worth of PI work, when it suddenly strikes me...
.......
.......
um...
.......
WTF AM I DOING IN MY POD?
.......
and then reality slowly sinks in....
.......
Where's my stuff?? Where's my cute little mammoth?? Where is my 400mil cargo?? Where's the fruit of this month's labour?

Even us carebears sometimes swear out loud and bang our puny soft fists into walls. I've just realised that.

I guess suicide ganking is still real. According to the killmail some russian minmatar idiot in a Tempest destroyed my trusty mammoth with a single 1400mm Howlitzer alpha strike. (Oh so the cargohold expander armor penalty does mean something after all...) Probably sniping from out of sentry range. Or something else us carebears will never understand. Damn you, you projectile sniper bullsh!t alpha-strike n00b pirate suicide gankster -10.0 non-carebear 14-year-old griefer ! (My alt can also fly tempests, just so you know! So THERE!)

Ah well. I bought myself some PLEX as a consolation. It helps... but only a little.

EVE is harsh man...HARSH! Even to us carebear noobs. Why do we even do this to ourselves?

KamikazeBrAzIl
Vera Cruz Alliance
Posted - 2011.07.28 22:53:00 - [2]
 

wow thats a cool story bro

Hisec is not safe. Protect your stuff as you can

Bart Starr
Posted - 2011.07.28 22:56:00 - [3]
 

Let this be a warning to you.
Lest your cold corpse is found hanging naked, asphyxiated in a seedy Bangkok hotel.

Lando Storm
Center for Advanced Studies
Posted - 2011.07.28 22:56:00 - [4]
 

because CCP wants you to buy plex

Lady Spank
Amarr
In Praise Of Shadows
Posted - 2011.07.28 23:01:00 - [5]
 

I like that you were the fool autopiloting 400m of stuff in a frail ship and yet the guy that ganked you is the idiot.

This story isn't funny, it's pathetic. All you have proven is suicide ganking is justified.

I have no idea why you do this to yourself when it's 99% avoidable.

Abrazzar
Posted - 2011.07.28 23:06:00 - [6]
 

And this, Ladies and Gentlemen, is why you buffer tank all your haulers. You can easily get a Mammoth up to 15k+ EHPs, which a single volley of a Tempest would not breach.

DJ Obsidian
RONA Legion
Posted - 2011.07.28 23:12:00 - [7]
 

just put some passive shield resist modules in the mids. most of the time that will be enough to deter suicide gankers. They use a combination of emp and fusion ammo so a passive em hardner will reduce the damage by 33% which if you think about it, is a huge chunk of an alpha strike.

Ris Dnalor
Minmatar
Fleet of Doom
Posted - 2011.07.28 23:16:00 - [8]
 

so the real question I have for the OP:

Which would you rather have more... 400m isk or the true story you've just told?

Seems like the isk was replaced in seconds...

Cipher Jones
Minmatar
Posted - 2011.07.28 23:20:00 - [9]
 

This thread has been rated 10/10 by Cipher Jones.


Barbelo Valentinian
Gallente
The Scope
Posted - 2011.07.29 00:03:00 - [10]
 

Edited by: Barbelo Valentinian on 29/07/2011 00:03:20
The endlessly entertaining thing about EVE is that you get to a certain point where you're fairly comfortable - you know how to avoid trouble, for the most part, and you generally fly safely and alertly.

But every now and then you let your guard down - often just for some stupid thing like going out for a ***.

And then you pay for your momentary lapse Laughing

It's happened to me quite a few times. It's always annoying when it happens, but the flip side it it's precisely what makes EVE feel alive - the ever-present risk, the need to be alert and aware, etc.

Olleybear
Minmatar
I R' Carebear
Posted - 2011.07.29 00:09:00 - [11]
 

Good story. Thanks for telling it. A lot of us have been in the exact same predictiment. As long as we learn and laugh about it, everythings cool. Sounds like you laughed and learned your lesson. All is good. Very Happy

Ivanna Price
Posted - 2011.07.29 00:12:00 - [12]
 

Your Mammoth had no tank whatsoever Confused Well, sucks but hopefully this will be a good lesson for you, if this sort of thing hasn't happened to you before (and hey, some consolation is that the 100+mil worth of PI goods didn't drop..). You have some options for the future.
1. Tank your indies.
2. Fly T2 indies. Prowler--quick to align and fits a covops cloak (can't always cloak at high traffic gates where you are more likely to end up in decloak distance from someone else after a jump). Mastodon--can fit a very respectable tank.
3. With both 1 and 2, still avoid putting 400mil worth of stuff in cargo. For expensive cargo, go with 4.
4. Orca. The Corporate Hangars in the Orca fit 40K m3, they are not scannable by players and nothing from them drops in case of a gank. Fitted with a MWD, you can have the Orca warp off gates in 10 seconds which makes even long trips okay. It's terrible for autopiloting, though, due to its low top speed on approach (my Charon beats my Orca in AP races every time even though the Charon takes longer to warp). With a DCU II running, an Orca also has good EHP.
5. Freighter. 400mil cargo isn't enough to warrant a freigther gank (usually) and it's faster than an Orca for AP'ing.

Croniac
Merlin Reach
Posted - 2011.07.29 00:17:00 - [13]
 

I'm about a 25mill sp 80% carebear much like the O.P.

But, Some of those 25million SP have me able to pilot a viator, which is a great little buddy for moving small expensive things in Highsec, it tanks reasonably, its quicker than spit, and cloaky.

Such a great little boat I use it as my daily driver for most of my work even if the cargo isn't valuable. And of course properly set up it will pretty easily move you along through low sec too.

Just something for you to consider buying with some of the Plex ISK you just bought.

Bashar Miles Teg
Posted - 2011.07.29 00:30:00 - [14]
 

They are called secure cargo containers.

P.S. They also increase your cargo capacity

Ivanna Price
Posted - 2011.07.29 01:11:00 - [15]
 

Originally by: Bashar Miles Teg
They are called secure cargo containers.

P.S. They also increase your cargo capacity


And they don't really protect your cargo as secure cargo containers are perfectly scannable. If you have one secure cargo container in your cargo filled with 50 highly valuable items and you get ganked, all of those items either drop or none of them drop (container + all items in it = single item for loot drop purposes). But yes, they do increase your cargo capacity so you can carry even more valuables in untanked ships Very Happy

Kro0k
Gallente
EVE Evacuation
Posted - 2011.07.29 01:14:00 - [16]
 

Not the poor mammoth Crying or Very sad....






YARRRR!!

SuZiE DeMaRcHi
Caldari
Working For The Enemy Federation
Posted - 2011.07.29 04:03:00 - [17]
 

Edited by: SuZiE DeMaRcHi on 29/07/2011 04:03:55
Originally by: Ashanta Shaanzera
So here's a sad, funny story I thought I'd never be able to tell.

I'm a carebear. A 25-million SP noob. Real-life hasn't allowed me the luxury of immersing myself in all of the nerve-wracking 0.0 stuff EVE has to offer. So I ended up an industry boff doing some invention, some T2 manufacturing, some trading, some PI nonsense and the like. Anything that makes money, even if it is the slow-but-sure kind.

Earlier tonight I got in my trusty Mammoth, did some maintenance and contracts and PI-ferrying and jobs. And then I thought, heck, let me go sell some of these Wetware Mainframes I've been producing the past three weeks. Hmmmm, yeah, let's throw in these Hulk BPCs I've invented as well, while we're at it... its not like I need them all!
I gather up the goods, and off we go. I'm 4 jumps away from Jita. About ISK400 mil worth of stuff in my cargohold.

Now there are few things I hate more than staring at a ship waiting to go into warp mode. "Warp drive... wait for it... WAIT FOR IT............active!"... (yawn) So as soon as I enter The Forge I open up my market browser and start putting in several buy orders for raw materials for the Hulks I'll churn out next week. I'm happily grafting away doing all kinds of carebear nonsense, Excel open on my other monitor, sending my cash to work while I warp and jump and warp and jump on the overview pane without worrying too much the details of my surroundings. I mean, this is hi-sec, right?

I arrive in Jita 4/4 ready to contract all these blueprints and sell three weeks' worth of PI work, when it suddenly strikes me...
.......
.......
um...
.......
WTF AM I DOING IN MY POD?
.......
and then reality slowly sinks in....
.......
Where's my stuff?? Where's my cute little mammoth?? Where is my 400mil cargo?? Where's the fruit of this month's labour?

Even us carebears sometimes swear out loud and bang our puny soft fists into walls. I've just realised that.

I guess suicide ganking is still real. According to the killmail some russian minmatar idiot in a Tempest destroyed my trusty mammoth with a single 1400mm Howlitzer alpha strike. (Oh so the cargohold expander armor penalty does mean something after all...) Probably sniping from out of sentry range. Or something else us carebears will never understand. Damn you, you projectile sniper bullsh!t alpha-strike n00b pirate suicide gankster -10.0 non-carebear 14-year-old griefer ! (My alt can also fly tempests, just so you know! So THERE!)

Ah well. I bought myself some PLEX as a consolation. It helps... but only a little.

EVE is harsh man...HARSH! Even to us carebear noobs. Why do we even do this to ourselves?


+ 1 for that story gold pure gold ^.^
I have a solutuion for you its called wait for it ................. CLOAKY HAULER'S ......................... < = EpIc WiN
even in high sec i allways cloak when in warp or about to warp and there you have it 95% of ganks fixed ^.^

Alec Freeman
Minmatar
The Dark Space Initiative
Revival Of The Talocan Empire
Posted - 2011.07.29 04:45:00 - [18]
 

Invest in an Orca or Transport ship for the big stuff and a Blockade Runner for the small stuff. Orca has ooodles of EHP so is very hard to suicide gank (250kish EHP), also has corp hanger arrays which cant be scanned. Transport Ships are neigh untackable when equiped with warp core stabalizers and if they get a chance to scan you well your in a blockade runner, then you are doing something wrong.

Johann King
Posted - 2011.07.29 04:49:00 - [19]
 

IN OTHER NEWS, 25 MILLION SKILLPOINT CHARACTERS ARE STILL CONSIDERED TO BE A NOOB

Ruze Ahkor'Murkon
Amarr
No Applicable Corporation
Posted - 2011.07.29 04:56:00 - [20]
 

+1 to the Op.

I got it. Nice tone, creative, and informative. But I think some of the people who responded, um, missed the intent a little bit. Salute, and hope to see you in space.

BeastlyRage
24th Imperial Crusade
Posted - 2011.07.29 05:26:00 - [21]
 

Welcome to EVE!

I am a suicide ganker myself, althought I haven't popped haulers.

What I have popped is a large amount of PvE ships.

My recent masterpiece was a 6 billion tengu, I believe the pilot left EVE for a month and is now just starting to show up again on watchlist.

Also recently killed a retriever with a 150mil officer mod on it :D

ProTip: Tempests suck at suiciding. Apocs are better in EVERY POSSIBLE WAY

Ashanta Shaanzera
Imba Industries
Posted - 2011.07.29 09:09:00 - [22]
 

Originally by: Ris Dnalor
so the real question I have for the OP:

Which would you rather have more... 400m isk or the true story you've just told?


Very Happy

Excellent point. (And several other excellent points) Funny that us people like to suffer so much. Without experiences like this, EVE would be an empty, unrewarding game. The constant threat of loss is what gives the sense of thrill and achievement.

On a more technical note....
I have the skeelz to fly transport ships... and I have a Crane which I used to use for low-sec hauls. But the thing takes only like 2000m2 cargo on the fitting that I used (can't remember the detail now). I've got about 27000m2 on the Mammoth and I was thinking about training for Gallente industrials so that I can use the Iteron V which can go to 50000+m2 I guess. I've also got a Freighter but it is huge and unpractical for all but very large hauls (which I often contract out to save me some RL time).

So really, how much cargo space can I realistically expect from a Blockade Runner or a Deep Space Transport? Any recommended fittings?

Solosky
Posted - 2011.07.29 09:38:00 - [23]
 

Originally by: Lady Spank
I like that you were the fool autopiloting


Some news for you: when you shoot industrial during initialization of warp - there is no difference if it's on autopilot or not.

RAW23
Posted - 2011.07.29 09:49:00 - [24]
 

Originally by: Lady Spank
I like that you were the fool autopiloting 400m of stuff in a frail ship and yet the guy that ganked you is the idiot.

This story isn't funny, it's pathetic. All you have proven is suicide ganking is justified.


lrn2self-deprecatethroughoveremphasis


 

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