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blankseplocked O'rly?! a.k.a. the Do Your Research Before You Shoot Thread
 
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Author Topic

Scum Ball
Posted - 2009.08.05 02:29:00 - [1]
 

Edited by: scum Ball on 05/08/2009 02:30:04
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.

So not too long ago this alliance 15-20 BS gang is zooming around looking for something to shoot. The enter a constellation and find a few small towers here and there. At this point someone in that fleet probably said: "Look! These two towers here are owned by [Insert Carebear Mining/Industrial Name] Alliance. Lets reinforce these towers; those carebears can't hurt us".

A short time later one of the CEOs of the Carebear named alliance goes onto TS, Evemail and the alliance forums stating that his towers where reinforced. The alliance directors all jump up and start crying..

*cough* *cough* sorry, a little sick here. ok, so the alliance directors start crying: Call To Arms! Call To Arms!

{insert} incase you dont know what a call to arms look like, see below:
CTA!
Location: System in backend of nowhere
Time/Date: When strong timer expires

We're being attacked! Form up so we can dock up and cry like little girls.

Ships required:
Rorquals > Hulks > Hulks > Hulks > Haulers > Mining cruisers/frigates (for support of coarse).
{/insert}

Fast forward 1d and 16 hours later...
the 15-20 BS comes back to finish the job they started. They send in 1 lone battleship to scout the system... poof! instapopped and podded. Laughing For some odd reason the rest of that fleet decided they had something more important to do.

At this point the Rorqs finished repping the towers in a few minutes and the hulk fleet went looking for something juicy to.. erm mine. Very Happy

The carebear named alliance had some intel that the agressor alliance has a POS half a dozen jumps away. The Hulks and Haulers converged on that system and proceeded to knock the stuffing out of said POS.

Fast forward again 1d and 16hs. The mighty hulk fleet again mobilizes to finish the job. They get to the target system and find the corp that owned the tower had left that alliance. Oh well YARRRR!! poof! goes the tower.Twisted Evil

There are two lessons to be learned from this story:
1. Do your research before you shoot. Just because an alliance has a carebear name does not mean they are carebears. Just a quick look at that Carebear Named alliance's KB would have shown that while the Agressor alliance was popping small towers with a 15 to 20 person BS gang, the Carebear alliance was popping large towers with 3x to 6x larger fleets.

2. Leaving an alliance to save your POS might work in hisec. Doesn't do anything if it's lowsec and there is no War Dec. Evil or Very Mad

Disclaimer:
No Navitas where hurt in the production of this thread.

...oh and there where lotsa Invisible Ninja Kittens. Razz

Dian'h Might
Minmatar
Cash and Cargo Liberators Incorporated
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:05:00 - [2]
 

Cool story bro

Illwen
Havoc Violence and Chaos
BricK sQuAD.
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:17:00 - [3]
 

Originally by: Dian'h Might
Cool story bro

Herty
The Sexy Carebear Boredom Convention
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:22:00 - [4]
 

Wow great story I loved it.

Lana Torrin
Brutor Tribe
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:23:00 - [5]
 

Originally by: scum Ball
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.


This is where I lost interest..

Jaedar Metron
Gigaverse
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:31:00 - [6]
 

Originally by: Lana Torrin
Originally by: scum Ball
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.


This is where I lost interest..


Why would anyone even bother creating topics for something other than spam if all they get is crap like "Cool story bro" and this?

Tldr: Nubcakes likes to pop towers, fails to get their intel right, gets owned by Rorqual + Hulk fleet.

Well written, no walls of text, good grammar. Worth a read, imo.

Lord Windu
Posted - 2009.08.05 03:50:00 - [7]
 

Wait, so a Hulk fleet killed a POS? As a Hulk only has drones for weapons then a Hulk is unable to deal any damage onto a control tower, modules yes, tower no. The drones that they use will have a range of about 4km, but the control towers forcefield has a radius of 15km for a small tower. So the drones would need 3x the range.

tl;dr version = Hulks don't shoot POS's.

Herty
The Sexy Carebear Boredom Convention
Posted - 2009.08.05 04:40:00 - [8]
 

Originally by: Lord Windu
Wait, so a Hulk fleet killed a POS? As a Hulk only has drones for weapons then a Hulk is unable to deal any damage onto a control tower, modules yes, tower no. The drones that they use will have a range of about 4km, but the control towers forcefield has a radius of 15km for a small tower. So the drones would need 3x the range.

tl;dr version = Hulks don't shoot POS's.

It was a stupid story what can I say.

PostmasterGeneral
Minmatar
yo i'm posting
Posted - 2009.08.05 04:59:00 - [9]
 

your posting, it needs to stop here

Mashashige
Minmatar
Eternal Perseverance
Hellstrome Alliance
Posted - 2009.08.05 06:06:00 - [10]
 

Well formatted +3
POS warfare -2
Cowardice +3
Battlehulks +10
No carebear tears -5
French name in first line of OP -6

=

3/10
Nice try, hopefully next one will be better.

Lexa Hellfury
Immortal.
Posted - 2009.08.05 06:26:00 - [11]
 

Originally by: Lord Windu
Wait, so a Hulk fleet killed a POS? As a Hulk only has drones for weapons then a Hulk is unable to deal any damage onto a control tower, modules yes, tower no. The drones that they use will have a range of about 4km, but the control towers forcefield has a radius of 15km for a small tower. So the drones would need 3x the range.

tl;dr version = Hulks don't shoot POS's.


I see you're familiar with sentry drones.

Omara Otawan
Posted - 2009.08.05 07:11:00 - [12]
 

Hmm, I'm gonna risk a guess here:

Rorquals = Chimeras, Nidhoggurs
Hulks = dunno, Geddons + Baddons, definitely not Tempests tho


Do I win?

Lana Torrin
Brutor Tribe
Posted - 2009.08.05 07:15:00 - [13]
 

Originally by: Jaedar Metron
Originally by: Lana Torrin
Originally by: scum Ball
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.


This is where I lost interest..


Why would anyone even bother creating topics for something other than spam if all they get is crap like "Cool story bro" and this?

Tldr: Nubcakes likes to pop towers, fails to get their intel right, gets owned by Rorqual + Hulk fleet.

Well written, no walls of text, good grammar. Worth a read, imo.


OK the part where you said "gets owned by Rorqual + Hulk fleet" sparked my interest enough to read the whole thing. Cool story (and I mean it) but it was not well written...

Scum Ball
Posted - 2009.08.05 07:49:00 - [14]
 

Originally by: Omara Otawan
Hmm, I'm gonna risk a guess here:

Rorquals = Chimeras, Nidhoggurs
Hulks = dunno, Geddons + Baddons, definitely not Tempests tho


Do I win?


you don't win... but you do get +10 Serious Internet Spaceship Points for seeing through my sardonic and self-deprecating humour. :)


Nel Tu
Minmatar
The Interstellar Cupcake Company
Posted - 2009.08.05 11:57:00 - [15]
 

* Please refrain from posting images - Zymurgist

Morvyn
Destry's Lounge
Important Internet Spaceship League
Posted - 2009.08.05 15:23:00 - [16]
 

Originally by: Jaedar Metron
Originally by: Lana Torrin
Originally by: scum Ball
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.


This is where I lost interest..


Why would anyone even bother creating topics for something other than spam if all they get is crap like "Cool story bro" and this?

Tldr: Nubcakes likes to pop towers, fails to get their intel right, gets owned by Rorqual + Hulk fleet.

Well written, no walls of text, good grammar. Worth a read, imo.


Cool story, bro.

Jimmy Kudo
Orgazmatron Team
Posted - 2009.08.05 15:50:00 - [17]
 

Originally by: Jaedar Metron
Originally by: Lana Torrin
Originally by: scum Ball
I was reading through Le Soltueur's Craptastic Tactics and it reminded me of a mildly amusing tale my Alt told me about.


This is where I lost interest..


Why would anyone even bother creating topics for something other than spam if all they get is crap like "Cool story bro" and this?

Tldr: Nubcakes likes to pop towers, fails to get their intel right, gets owned by Rorqual + Hulk fleet.

Well written, no walls of text, good grammar. Worth a read, imo.


umm cool story bro

War Kitten
Panda McLegion
Posted - 2009.08.05 16:13:00 - [18]
 

Originally by: scum Ball

...oh and there where lotsa Invisible Ninja Kittens. Razz


Pics or it didn't happen!

Also the department of redundancy department wants to know where one finds visible Ninja Kittens.

Jenni Falorgen
Nemissaries of Vengeance
Posted - 2009.08.05 16:31:00 - [19]
 

Cool story bro.

actually sounds a little familiar Shocked

SirWOLFE
Caldari
Versatech Co.
Raiden.
Posted - 2009.08.05 16:52:00 - [20]
 

wow that sounds familiar

Angelus Blackheart
Warped Mining
Posted - 2009.08.05 17:30:00 - [21]
 

Sounds Familiar

And its not the first time this sorta thing has happened

Oh Noes we war deced a mining corp and they are shooting back!

bigred monkey
Caldari Provisions
Posted - 2009.08.05 17:35:00 - [22]
 

hulks = check
pos in back end system = check
carebear name = check
done this like 3 weeks ago = check

****!! was this us??

Artemis Rose
Clandestine Vector
THE SPACE P0LICE
Posted - 2009.08.05 18:23:00 - [23]
 

Originally by: Lord Windu


tl;dr version = Hulks don't shoot POS's.


You could put 2x Sentry drone in a Hulk Twisted Evil

Saju Somtaaw
Kagan-Kincaid Enterprises
Posted - 2009.08.06 04:11:00 - [24]
 

Drones can pack a punch, plus hulks have 3 high slots for smartbombs, though I don't know if they'd work on POS shields.


 

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