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blankseplocked RuffRyderz Corporation: You Have Mail!
 
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Adrian Steel
Caldari
Kabukimono Exploration Syndicate
Greater Realms
Posted - 2007.08.27 16:03:00 - [1]
 

The KNOW foundation against piracy and other space-borne hooliganism is proud to give you the good news! Your corporation has been randomly selected from a pool of grownups who can't read good and want to do other stuff good too to participate in a complete reorganization and reprocessing of your assets at the hands of our skilled and willing volunteers!

You should be pleased to know that the proceeds will go towards the purchase of soft and cuddly blankets for children orphaned by pilots such as yourselves. To speed up the process, you are invited to surrender your equipment at a space station of your choice.

Should you wish to opt out of our "keep the space-lanes clean of trash" initiative, please pay the small administrative fee of 50 million ISK to the foundation.

The KNOW team wishes you a pleasant recycling.

Kane Rizzel
NovaKane Incorporated
Posted - 2007.08.27 16:16:00 - [2]
 

so you're ransoming pirates?

Pot! phone! it's kettle, he wants a word with you

Sakura Nihil
Selective Pressure
Rote Kapelle
Posted - 2007.08.27 16:21:00 - [3]
 

Grats on the idea if nothing else Razz.

Jirai Grepher
Gallente
Amok.
Goonswarm Federation
Posted - 2007.08.27 17:36:00 - [4]
 

.....I fly cruisers that are worth more than 50mill..



If your going to ransom some1 at least make it for more isk then i have lost in the couch cushions.

maCH'EttE
Defenders of Order
Posted - 2007.08.27 18:09:00 - [5]
 

So... Wait... You're paying to give them more valid targets, and I guess you're planning to take the fight to them, also? I'm, a little of RuffRyderz TBH, some people get all the luck...

Nocturnal Avenger
Sebiestor Tribe
Posted - 2007.08.27 18:15:00 - [6]
 

Originally by: Adrian Steel
Your corporation has been randomly selected from a pool of grownups who can't read good...


It seems to me that you don't write very well...

Nyck
Not Your Common Killers
Posted - 2007.08.27 18:17:00 - [7]
 

OOH! OOH! US NEXT! We're only 2 pirates, and we suck! Honest!

rand0 eastman
Gallente
Garoun Investment Bank
Posted - 2007.08.27 18:22:00 - [8]
 

Originally by: Nocturnal Avenger
Originally by: Adrian Steel
Your corporation has been randomly selected from a pool of grownups who can't read good...


It seems to me that you don't write very well...


apparently someone has never watched zoolander. subtly whitty post, tho i agree that you have no real idea how to ransom a corp.

xenodia
Gallente
DYNAMIC INTERVENTION
ORPHANS OF EVE
Posted - 2007.08.27 18:35:00 - [9]
 

Originally by: Adrian Steel
The KNOW foundation against piracy and other space-borne hooliganism is proud to give you the good news! Your corporation has been randomly selected from a pool of grownups who can't read good and want to do other stuff good too to participate in a complete reorganization and reprocessing of your assets at the hands of our skilled and willing volunteers!

You should be pleased to know that the proceeds will go towards the purchase of soft and cuddly blankets for children orphaned by pilots such as yourselves. To speed up the process, you are invited to surrender your equipment at a space station of your choice.

Should you wish to opt out of our "keep the space-lanes clean of trash" initiative, please pay the small administrative fee of 50 million ISK to the foundation.

The KNOW team wishes you a pleasant recycling.


So... your master plan for financial success is to attemp to ransom isk out of pirates by threatening to give them exactly what they want (targets) if they dont pay ? Somehow I dont see this ending well for you.


Chasm Illyaki
Repo Industries
Posted - 2007.08.27 19:16:00 - [10]
 

Edited by: Chasm Illyaki on 27/08/2007 19:19:20
As one of the "Ammunition Delivery Specialists" currently employed by Repo Industries, I wish to fore-warn you that any attempt to "ransom" Repo Industries will be declined in the anticipation of the war that is certain to follow. This is not an attempt to deter you from ransoming the above mentioned Corporation, quite the contrary. In Repo Industries, we believe that there are never enough war targets and we have too much ammunition.
Sincerely,
===Original Signed===
Chasm Illyaki, Ammunition Delivery Specialist, Repo Industries


JoeT
Amarr
Quantum Horizons
Posted - 2007.08.27 19:47:00 - [11]
 

Can I be next :D

T'Renn
Silver Snake Enterprise
Posted - 2007.08.27 20:02:00 - [12]
 

JoeT does not forgive.

Adrian Steel
Caldari
Kabukimono Exploration Syndicate
Greater Realms
Posted - 2007.08.27 20:14:00 - [13]
 

Ladies and gentlemen, please calm down! The recycling had already been started before this notice. We weren't going to give them the option of opting out of it before it even started! That would be extortion!

For those of you clamoring to have your goods recycled as well, I'm afraid you'll have to wait in line. There's only so many volunteers for the job.

LastTraitorStanding
Amarr
The Imperial Assassins
Warped Aggression
Posted - 2007.08.27 21:17:00 - [14]
 

Originally by: Chasm Illyaki
Edited by: Chasm Illyaki on 27/08/2007 19:19:20
As one of the "Ammunition Delivery Specialists" currently employed by Repo Industries, I wish to fore-warn you that any attempt to "ransom" Repo Industries will be declined in the anticipation of the war that is certain to follow. This is not an attempt to deter you from ransoming the above mentioned Corporation, quite the contrary. In Repo Industries, we believe that there are never enough war targets and we have too much ammunition.
Sincerely,
===Original Signed===
Chasm Illyaki, Ammunition Delivery Specialist, Repo Industries




Dear Repo,

Please give me all your Fanta and a twinky or else we shall blot out the sun with our nubships. YARRRR!!

Thx,

LTS.

Inturist
FSB-ALFA
RED.OverLord
Posted - 2007.08.27 21:42:00 - [15]
 

Edited by: Inturist on 28/08/2007 10:54:52
Edited by: Inturist on 27/08/2007 21:42:43
Originally by: JoeT
Can I be next :D


Please Plese , u need to dec war to joeT , his a very bad piwat YARRRR!! Embarassed Twisted Evil

Gaven Blands
Caldari
Cosmic Fusion
Systematic-Chaos
Posted - 2007.08.28 13:26:00 - [16]
 

Do you avoid the word Vigilantes because it has negative connotations?

Wouldn't want you to lose any sleep though, you are the good guys. Rolling Eyes

Adrian Steel
Caldari
Kabukimono Exploration Syndicate
Greater Realms
Posted - 2007.08.29 09:03:00 - [17]
 

Edited by: Adrian Steel on 29/08/2007 09:03:21
Vigilante? I prefer the term "recycler extraordinaire." It has a sort of higher than thou and knuckle-dragger ring to it all at the same time, which tickles my sense of humor and has me giggling with glee.

To give my loyal audience an update:

As of the beginning of the recycling period, RuffRyderz Incorporated has failed to put out their trash. Not one bit of debris has been spotted in the spacelanes. I am beginning to wonder if they have taken up residence away from their habitual (and most noble) headquarters at Kisogo VII - State War Academy. Have they gotten bored of making a mess of things with rookie pilots? Or perhaps the Sate War Academy decided to do some of their own cleaning afterall?

Each time a day goes by where my trash collector runs with an empty bin, this trash man gets less excercise, and pops donuts to spend the time. Please, think of my waste-line! (Sorry, I had to).

Rashmika Clavain
Gallente
Posted - 2007.08.29 09:45:00 - [18]
 

lol very good Very Happy

Good luck with it!


 

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