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blankseplocked PRODUCT RECALL: SQUEAKY BEE PLUSHIES
 
This thread is older than 90 days and has been locked due to inactivity.


 
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Aracturus
Posted - 2011.09.01 22:33:00 - [1]
 

The message begins with a short clip of Aracturus being mauled by what appear to be sentient Plushies.
Then a picture of the same bee, but made of metal.

"WARNING! IF YOU PURCHASED A GOONTECH® SqueakyBee™ PLUSHIE, PLEASE RETURN THEM TO YOUR LOCAL GOONTECH® RETAILER IMMEDIATELY. THE SqueakyBee™ PLUSHIES HAVE BEEN FOUND TO EXHIBIT EXTREME INTELLIGENCE SIMILAIR TO ROGUE DRONES IN BEHAVIOUR, DUE TO SLEEPER TECHNOLOGY USED IN THEIR CONSTRUCTION. DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES ATTEMPT TO HARM THE SqueakyBee™ AS THIS WILL ONLY ANGER IT AND ENDANGER YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONES. THEY HAVE BEEN FOUND TO BE CAPABLE OF FLYING AND SURVIVING IN SPACE, AND WILL WORK TO MAKE MORE OF THEMSELVES USING ANY MATERIALS AT HAND. IF YOUR SqueakyBee™ PLUSHIE'S EYES BEGIN TO GLOW, TAKE NO ACTION BUT CONTACT YOUR LOCAL DED ENFORCEMENT OFFICIAL IMMEDIATELY. THE SqueakyBee™ PLUSHIE HAS BEEN CLASSIFIED BY THE DED AS A CLASS 3 ROGUE DRONE INTELLIGENCE. ANY SIGHTINGS OF THESE CREATURES SHOULD BE REPORTED TO YOUR LOCAL DED BRANCH IMMEDIATELY.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION."

The message ends with a clip of several thousand SqueakyBee™ Plushies with glowing eyes attempting to ram a station window.

Tarryn Nightstorm
Minmatar
Hellstar Towing and Recovery
Posted - 2011.09.02 00:18:00 - [2]
 

() () ....Braiiiiin!
(ƒ;..;)ƒ
(")(")

Jason Galente
Gallente
mishima ryu
Posted - 2011.09.02 02:05:00 - [3]
 

After recovering my lost camera and the drone that stole it, I took it apart and discovered some shocking failure on the part of the designer.

You didn't replace the AI Core: they were effectively sleeper drones shaped like bees. I fixed this problem by replacing its AI core with that of a NORMAL drone plushie, and just in case, installed a small-scale EMP emitter to immediately disable it at the push of a button should it grow rowdy again, and gave it as a gift to Ilsenae.

Next time you use parts from killer technology, be careful just which parts you use..


Aracturus
Posted - 2011.09.02 03:01:00 - [4]
 

YOU CUT OPEN AN ADORABLE PLUSHIE?! HOW COULD YOU?!

Aiwha
Caldari
101st Space Marine Force
Nulli Secunda
Posted - 2011.09.02 06:20:00 - [5]
 

Only the goons...

Stilo Refrin
Posted - 2011.09.02 10:26:00 - [6]
 

My kid had one of these, but we had to get rid of it because it was just too obnoxious. Just wanted attention all the time!

Kazzzi
Amarr
Heathen Legion
Ushra'Khan
Posted - 2011.09.02 12:33:00 - [7]
 

I bought one for my daughter. She loves it.

Would I recommend this item to a friend? Yes.


N'maro Makari
Posted - 2011.09.05 23:35:00 - [8]
 

Maybe summit this to Arek'Jaalan? They would undoubtedly be interested in this use of sleeper tech.


 

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