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Dace Kaveira
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:07:00 - [61]

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
It is a period of expansions. The EVE community, striking from a hidden
base, have won their first victory
against the evil CCP.

During the battle, community spies managed
to steal secret plans to CCP’s
ultimate weapon, the Vanity Shop, an
armored Shop with it's deadly Monocle it
wields the power to destroy enitre games.

Pursued by the CCP sinister agents,
the community races home aboard her SPACESHIP,
custodian of the stolen plans
that can save it’s players and bring
lower GPU usage and useful expansion to the game....

Hemmo Paskiainen
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:08:00 - [62]

I quit because ccp has their head beween their legs sniffing up the donkeyass smell of milking out people with useless stuff we dont want and taxes on 3rd party apps; and still they keep implementing uselsess "features" instead of fixing spaceships in a spazeship game.

I quit because ccp wants us to run missions in high sec; abandon 0.0 by hitting it with the nerf bat; and destroy the 0.0 community cause they probaly moawn too much about broken spaceships.

I quit beacuse who ever is inventing the last few patches is not playing eve and has absolutly no idea how the eve community thinks or operates elsewere than high or low sec.

I quit eve because there is no understanding about general 0.0 sec by the ones that should implement stuff; welcome to supers-online; and yet they keep promoting 0.0 as end goal of all players. Still they wonder why sub's % wise are going down > boost agents > FAIL more

In the end i quit eve because i dont want play wow by grinding missions; i get forced to only fly hurricanes and vagabonds; i dont want to walk and spin ships in stations; dont want to play sims online; i dont want to buy a super and be forced to get second account; i just want to pew pew people without playing docking games in high sec, without playing battships and battlecruizers online getting sec hits in low sec, i just want to pew pew people in 0.0 and why is it so hard? why do i have to spend 4 hours roaming to get 1-2 maybe 3 kills? Dear ccp nerf it more, and see the subs plummet..

Isil Rahsen
Ferrum Superum
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:09:00 - [63]

Edited by: Isil Rahsen on 23/06/2011 09:09:50
Originally by: mental mavrick
Please visit your user settings to re-enable images.
LaughingLaughingLaughingLaughingJesus tap dancing Christ my sides hurt.

Darkstar Defense Industries
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:10:00 - [64]

Take 2.
For legal purposes, this is a purely hypothetical plan but is my entry for this competition.

I really would like to continue playing eve, but in protest of the new RMT model, I will be staging a station sit in at our favorite Jita 4-4 station. All are welcome, even our favorite Orphanage fans, to see just how many pod pilots can be squeezed inside of one station. We will plan ahead for the enevitable "2000 pilot local cap" by having large rotations of players create jump clones in the jita station by jumping out of jita 4-4 to their favorite jump clone station. Hordes of newbs shall be lured into Jita with promises of free covetors or free rifters, or whatever excites them. Once our scout reports that the local level has hit 2000, 1000's of players will utilize their shiny new jumpclones to arrive into jita. As far as I know, jumpclones can get around the whole shutdown of the gates. And we will sit in jita, effectively blockading the trade hub by forcing the gates to be shut down, until eventually too many players have JCed into the favorite hub. Or it runs dry (unlikely). Also, everyone shall have a personal fire in their CQ, and it should look like this:
Please visit your user settings to re-enable images.

Aoki Ayumi
University of Caille
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:10:00 - [65]

I incarnaquit

Hulkageddon Orphanage
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:10:00 - [66]

Edited by: Miilla on 23/06/2011 09:11:14

> Would you like to play a game of Thermonuclear War?

> G A M E O V E R

> Opening account management..... Cancelling subscription.....

How about a song from GLaDOS?

Weeble Tauri
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:12:00 - [67]

Yup, another Inglorious Bastards parody

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:13:00 - [68]

I quit for justice. For CCP's sake i hope all the money they will get from selling monocles will cover for half the players they will loose by implementing this ****.

No i wouldn't mind having your stuff or at least some of it, i'll put it to good use before my subscription expires.

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:15:00 - [69]



who would stop eve when having 300 billion in your wallet....


Tron Flux
Midnite Madness
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:15:00 - [70]

Dear CCP,

Since the Incarna release, I have noticed an inordinate number of people posting on the forums who appear to be functionally illiterate and incapable of basic logical thoughts. These people are a severe detriment to the game experience. Since you refuse to remove these people from with the game or the forums, I have no choice but to quit, lest I be dragged down to their level of idiotic discourse and beaten with their supreme experience in the field.



Jada Maroo
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:16:00 - [71]

Originally by: MrNoodless

who would stop eve when having 300 billion in your wallet....

When 300 billion can only buy 250 monocles. Sad

Mr R4nd0m
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:18:00 - [72]

im quitting cos i have just be trolled!

Dace Kaveira
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:19:00 - [73]


Last Expansion, I gave you much stuff
But the very next day, You flame it away
Right now, to save me from tears
I'll give you the Captains Quarters

Last Expansion, I gave you much stuff
But the very next day, You flame it away
Right now, to save me from tears
I'll give you the Vanity Shop

Once trolled and twice broken
We keep our distance but your flaming still catches my eye
Tell me community do you recognise me?
Well it's been an expansion, it doesn't surprise me

(Happy Incarna!) I patched it up and sent it
With a note saying "INCARNA RELEASES 1.0 21st OF JUNE" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you didn’t flame me I could have time to patch this **** back


(Oooh. Oooh Community)

A crowded forum, friends with square eyes
I'm hiding from you and useless flaming
My Tengu I thought you were someone to rely on
Us? I guess I was a shoulder to release carebear tears on
A face on a whiner with a troll in his post
A man undercover but you trolled me apart
Oooh Oooh
Now I've found a real patch you'll never flame me again


A face on a whiner with a troll in his post
(Gave you my ****)
A man undercover but you trolled me apart
Next expansion
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special
who cares.
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone who can run it.
who'll give me something in return, named money.
I'll give it to someone
hold my e-peen and watch it grow
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone who wants it.
I've got you here to stay
I can love you if you pay
I thought you were someone who liked EVE
gave you my stuff
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone
last expansion I gave you much stuff
you flamed it again
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone WHO CARES.

Krelian Lann
The Zohar Project
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:25:00 - [74]

Keep the submissions going, this has been amazing so far.

I'm going to bed but tomorrow i will review all submissions, i promise.

I have a winner so far in my head, will see if tomorrow brings a better one.

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:25:00 - [75]

Edited by: Caldinea on 23/06/2011 09:26:09
I'd like to think of a funny quit letter, but I can't.

I like EVE. A lot. I met my husband here in Otou in 2009. We jet-set across the ocean back and forth a few times and then were married in 2010. It's creepy to admit it's part of my life like that.

We're waiting on immigration paperwork and right now EVE is the game we play together. With this terrible uproar we've both lost a lot of faith in a game that we've not only devoted a lot of time into, but in its own way gave each of an important part of our lives -- eachother.

Ah well. At least I won't have to flash my **** on webcam as payment to random corps to end wardecs anymore. Hey. Anything for the corp.

/so posted on an alt

Dace Kaveira
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:27:00 - [76]

Keep you in the post
You know they all pretend
Keep you in the post
And so it all began

Send in your employees
Sing as their bugs go marching in... again
The need you buried deep
The secrets that they keep are ever ready
Are you ready?
I'm finished farming ISK
Done killing stuff
That whole defense

Spinning infinity, EVE
The patch is spinning me
It's never-ending, never-ending
Same old story

What if I say we’re like the others?
What if I say we’re just another one of their plays?
We’re the pretenders
What if I say if they will never surrender?

In time or so I'm told
I'm just another character for sale... oh, well
The patch is out of print
We are not permanent
We're temporary, temporary
Same old story

They’re the voice inside the forums
Who lock your post
They’re the blue lined people that you have to face
Mirrored in your stare
They’re what's left,They’re what's right
THEY’RE the enemy
They’re the hand that will take you down
Bring you to your knees

So who are they?
Yeah, who are they?
Yeah, who are they?


I keep posting all day if I have to, I got a long playlist and a good imagination.

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:30:00 - [77]

1. Drink 3 bottles of space rum
2. Stagger around the CQ for an hour singing
3. Slam "biomass self" button with forehead

Krelian Lann
The Zohar Project
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:30:00 - [78]

I am going to add one here that was sent to me by EveMail, so she can be part of the contest:

Breaking up is easy
From: Lana Torrin
Sent: 2011.06.23 08:27
To: Krelian Lann,

Cant reply to your post, still working off a ban..  Petition this on your way out..

Dear CCP,

I'm terribly sorry I had to do this through a letter, this didn't need to be done, but I wanted to anyway.. This note will be the last memory you'll ever have of me, our relationship just isnt working out for me.. Don't let it get you all upset inside, It was completely your fault, no doubt about it. It is because of your history of stupidity that keep me from being even remotely interested in continuing this relationship with you.

You'd be much better off finding a person that can deal with crazy way you treat people. I might miss certain things about you such as the time you d3eleted everyones boot.ini, that was pro.. Or the time you actualy released a good expansion, if I can ever remember when that was.

I'm glad this is done and we're going separate directions for good. I think you'll find someone to cheat on you daily, and write a letter through text messages. And hopefully we will be incredibly far away.

Good riddance,

Krelian Lann

Krelian Lann
The Zohar Project
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:33:00 - [79]


Don't quit!
From: Azz505
Sent: 2011.06.23 08:35
To: Krelian Lann,

I've never met you and yet i feel so sad that you plan on quitting, you should give someone who would look after your assets "cough" me "cough" and use it for good, such as killing people and revenge!

Please don't quit.. but if you do, you can count on me to share your grief!

"To make it fall into the "I Quit" subject.... I Quit."

Nabasuko Donosor
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:33:00 - [80]

I quit,

Well, actualy I don't realy quit.
I quit because I writing I'm quiting, but I'm not realy quiting.
I'm posting I'm quiting, that is.
I'm posting quiting because somebody is quiting and asking to post that I'm quiting
Now everybody posting they're quiting, but not really quiting are doing this to win the price for quiting. (Not realy quiting, but posting quiting)

That's why I quit (not realy quiting) together with all the others on this thread quiting (Only one quiting in this thread, all the others are not really quiting, they post they're quiting)

You see ?

Lidia Prince
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:35:00 - [81]

Can you send some ISK to me please? I'd really appreciate it.

Krelian Lann
The Zohar Project
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:35:00 - [82]

And another:

"I quit"
From: Sin Easts
Sent: 2011.06.23 09:00
To: Krelian Lann,

Hello, I¨ve upgraded my acc from trial just tommorow (yes, just a few hours before the internal document leaked) so I am still not able to post in forum, however here is my contribution :)

If I may add a personal message, I would say do not quit... I understand all of the arguments, however quitting does not change anything. I believe majority of the players do not want to use MT and if they quit, it will either die or change in another asian style Pay to win mmo. If players stay and will ignore the MT for the most part, then it becomes a failure, which can not be ignored for various reason. Eve players are famous for ther patience and this is fight which requiers the most patience of them all. :)

However, I wish you luck and fun wherever you decide to move.

Sincerely, S.E.

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:35:00 - [83]

Edited by: BacTyrael on 23/06/2011 09:48:41
This guy had the right idea. I have played off and on since 06. My first experience with the game involved joining a low sec corporation and mining... I stopped playing for about two years for obvious reasons. Coming back in about early 09, I joined another corp but null sec this time. Everything went fine, belt security, good money, exotic dancers, you know how it is. But then some arse from corp decides to get revenge on one guy by genocide'ing the corp with the POS included. Smart idea by being our scout and leading us into a large bubble on gate by saying it was clear. He had been waiting a few months on a different char to get this revenge. Bravo for that.

Seeing as I was still a noob by definition. I decided to go back to other games where I was already established and not starting out with 5,000 isk and a noob ship. But never the less I decide to come back. So in early 2010 I boot my account back up and make this guy. Selling my old hulk pilot netted me a decent amount of isk. It allowed me to learn the ropes of combat with a free leash on my wallet. But my corp choice seems to be bad. So I join a high security mission corp this time. WH Pos going up, veteran players, some reassurance in them. Once again as you could guess it all goes to shambles. Guy running the POS has to leave, along with his small fortune, that keeps everything running "including security". And the corp falls apart one by one as the main fuel source "industry, R&D, some mining." Disappear over night. So I quit again...

Now CCP releases an expansion with very little change to the actual game itself. I am currently playing and don't have a huge interest in the new content. I can't see myself dropping subscription this time unless they release non-vanity items for aurum. And I think I have learned from most of my mistakes. You have my older I quits, not much rage but I made you something.

Please visit your user settings to re-enable images.
Edit for: Supercaps, monocles, hybrid turrets suck, why is my trit worthless, and WTF $7.50c just to train one skill?!?!!111 /rage

Trinity Corporate Services
Terran United Federation
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:37:00 - [84]

I always miss out on these freaking threads.... some day I get billions :(

Dace Kaveira
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:38:00 - [85]

Oh and by the way, I dont want all the ISK for myself, I would atleast share more then half with friends \o/ And I will give you a memorial in my bio :c

Democracy of Klingon Brothers
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:43:00 - [86]

Edited by: Iamien on 23/06/2011 09:43:32
If I win I'll spend a large portion of it hiring mercorps to wardec those who purchase monocles, at least when such a thing can be done effectively.

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:49:00 - [87]

Edited by: Raastul on 23/06/2011 09:52:10
Edited by: Raastul on 23/06/2011 09:51:01
Quitters never win!

Much the Same - Quitters Never Win!

Let's go!

Mara Rinn
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:49:00 - [88]

In Russia, EVE stops playing you!

(I'm going back to WoW)

Posted - 2011.06.23 09:49:00 - [89]

Give me your iskies, and I'll wait around for the next Plex for charity drive, and donate the lot.
At least that way, CCP doesn't get the money!

Red Federation
RvB - RED Federation
Posted - 2011.06.23 09:53:00 - [90]

i refuse to kick start the Icelandic banking recovery. Therefore, it is with regret that i must say ...poke it up your ass, i'm outta here losers

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