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Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.24 13:54:00 - [121]
 

Dear Edaine,
I was completely in the wrong and I apologize for my inexcusable behavior. I make no excuses, but I do look for reasons for my own sake, not yours. When I look at the dialogue that you posted here, I am shocked at myself for reacting as I did. Was I tired at the end of the day? That is no excuse, but it might be a reason. Was I frayed by the constant back stabbing and manipulation among pilots? That is no excuse but it might be a reason.

I have no just cause to distrust you, Edaine. However, I have every reason to distrust those who questioned your motives and claimed to have heard you say things you didn't say. How stupid was I not to immediately see through their attempt to drive a wedge between members of our organization. That was quite dim-witted of me. Have five recent poddings dulled my judgments? That is no excuse, but it might be a reason.

All reasons aside, there was and is not any excuse for the disrespect, distrust, and wrong words I spoke against you, Edaine. I talk about forgiveness a lot in my work. I will now ask of it from you as well. Please forgive me and please do not leave the organization that your vision started. Hard as it may be to believe, I commit to entrust the management of this organization into your capable hands.

One step further: I will open another thread here specifically to state a public apology.

Most sincerely,
Ston Momaki

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.25 01:35:00 - [122]
 

All is forgiven. Now back to work.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.25 02:19:00 - [123]
 

HOW JUSTIFICATION IS MADE FOR KILLING
What follows in the verbatim of a conversation I had this evening. I am going to mark in bold the point in the conversation where Shallindria turned from pure honesty about her love of violence to a justification of it based her concept of Justice. I will then mark again in bold where she returns to the primal violent intinct. The context is when I narrowly escaped being killed by her.

Ston Momaki > Shallindria, I stole just a little from you
shallindria > oh no
Ston Momaki > yes, can you believe it. There goes the neighborhood
shallindria > u got lucky
shallindria > :)
Ston Momaki > Were gonna kill me?
shallindria > maybeeeee
Ston Momaki > Do you like killin
shallindria > Yes I do
Ston Momaki > Why? What about Kiiling to you like?
shallindria > I like the thoguht of the airless void crushinbg the life out of you.
Ston Momaki > Hmm. So it is personal
shallindria > Not really
Ston Momaki > Anyone will do then, as long as someone has the life crushed out of them?
shallindria > Indeed
Ston Momaki > Were you always this way?
shallindria > I think u have it
shallindria > yes... I have an evil streak
Ston Momaki > Is the evil streak greater than your good?
shallindria > Well I've not really thought about it but in this case since you robbed me you are the evil one..
Ston Momaki > Does my evil make you feel justified in your's?
shallindria > and deserve punishment.. yes
Ston Momaki > You are fit to deliver that justice?
shallindria > Yes... I feel I have the right..
Ston Momaki > The right to kill?
shallindria > Becuse you must be dealt with.
Ston Momaki > Why must I be dealt with?
shallindria > You've broken the law and you must pay at the end of a missile or two or three
Ston Momaki > How noble of you to care so deeply about Justice
shallindria > Then if possible I'd like to pod you... and make jelly out of your gord.
shallindria > But thats like a Bonus


Note that when I wanted to talk about the conflict of good and evil within her, she immediately used the concept of justice to escape that existential sort of pain inherent to that discussion.

I recently had a conversation with a fellow pilot, a female, as to who is more or less aggressive in violence in our universe, men or women. She hesitated to answer. I think she I might be trying to trap her. Actually, I really am curious. Two of the most graphic and verbally aggressive encounters I have had have been with women, one in sub null space, and this one. Did you note the graphic nature of her discriptions? Violence is also in the imagination.

I could get no more conversation in this situation. I hope shallindria find peace and deliverence from the violence that owns her. The Disciples of Ston bid you peace.

P.S. Edaine, thanks for the grace of forgiveness that I did not deserve.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.25 15:41:00 - [124]
 

CORPORATE FINANCE NEWS

We have received our first full week's endowment return at a bit over 5Mil ISK. That with a Disciple donation of 5 mil ISK will cover the next month's office rent. Our weekly endowment income is sufficient to maintain our current office if costs remain the same.

Edaine Numenor CEO/CFO The Disciples of Ston

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.26 17:37:00 - [125]
 

YOU DO NOT HAVE THE EYES OF A KILLER

Well, at least your avatar doesn't. Every now and then, but rarely, I will work in the morning so I meet new people I would otherwise miss. Today was such an occasion. I stole from a young women, who later contacted me for an explanation. She indicated that she did not mind me looting her wrecks. She went on to say that she experienced joy in killing. I pressed her on the issue by pointing out the contrast of putting the words "joy" and "killing" together. She retracted her earlier statement and revised her expression around the theme of self-defense. I closed our conversation with the headline at the beginning of this log.

As I reflect on this and other observations, I come to a preliminary conclusion that many pilots only pretend to be real "killers." It is part of the expected bravado of New Eden. If we don't project the persona of violence we will get trampled and not survive. When pressed, I think many capsuleers live with violence as a part of their lives but would not really choose to pair "joy" with "killing." Some do, obviously, but not all. Like this young lady, they enjoy mining and building and do not have the eyes of a killer.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.27 14:34:00 - [126]
 

Glad I worked in the morning yesterday, because last night was too quiet. Quit early. Manwe has had some interesting work, though.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.28 02:20:00 - [127]
 

THE LIFE OF A BLEEDING HEART AND SAP
First
Tonight was a productive night in that I was able to interact most pleasantly with a pilot that actually had a very light hold on his possessions. This is an infrequent occurrence in New Eden and a refreshing one when it happens.
Second
I learned how to say " I have stolen from you" in German: Ich habe dir gestohlen. Now when the German corps based in Piekura are out doing their thing. I can make sure they know that the Disciples of Ston care about them too.
Third
I always feel bad when I see people identify themselves with denigrating names. Sometimes, maybe i take it too seriously, but I have seen enough pain in this universe to tell me that there can be a lot of pain behind so-called humor. I ran across such a person tonight. She wouldn't say much other than to say that she chose her name to make others laugh. I hope that is true, but I feel inside that there is more. I hope that she truly values her own uniqueness and that the name she has chosen has no bearing on who she really is.

The Disciples of Ston bid New Eden peace and good night.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.29 02:50:00 - [128]
 

IT IS HARD FOR CAPSULEERS TO BE BRAVE

The capsuleer culture encourages bravado, posturing, persona projection, but not true bravery. History paints the picture of true brvery as those who fight for principle in the face of certain loss, even death.

Capsuleer culture says that you act brave, when you know you possess the upper hand. Posture youself in the best possible light, but exit the situation when it is certain you will experience loss.

Other pilots find it very easy to destroy my unarmed ship after I have taken a trifle from their rat wrecks. Sometimes, afterwards there is taunting and threatening. I have been destroyed multiple times while on someone's clock, all the while they carry on with boastful words about all that they are gonna do to me.

Funny what happens as soon as Concord becomes a threat. Suddenly,there is nothing left of that which was so boldly proclaimed

No wonder, capsuleers are indoctrinated to be this way. Does anyone know what it really means to be brave?

QuoVash
Posted - 2011.05.29 10:38:00 - [129]
 

Quote:
No wonder, capsuleers are indoctrinated to be this way. Does anyone know what it really means to be brave?


Reading this thread springs to mind.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.29 20:43:00 - [130]
 

Corporate News
I have stepped up mining operations in hopes of eventually doubling our endowment principal. This would enable us to open a second office. In the mean time, Manwe has reported that the system in Amarr space we had originally chosen, is not what we had hoped. We may need to take some work time to do more scouting.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.30 03:37:00 - [131]
 

CHANGES IN PIEKURA

I have noticed as of late, some changes in Piekura. As those changes have occurred, I have also noted changes in myself. Tonight, things were slow, peaceful, and relaxed. I had one ship destroyed but no conversations of note. I found myself rather content in this and a little glad that I "didn't have to work very hard." This is not so good and I do not want to slide into complacency.

Perhaps it is a good time to accept Manwe's invitation to join him in Abudban for some work there. We tend to work different hours, and from the way things sound, there is plenty of work for a "couple of shifts" so to speak. There is also the need to do more scouting in Amarr space. It might be time to take a break from Piekura for a while, meet some new pilots, and cause our brand of "trouble" elsewhere.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.31 00:10:00 - [132]
 

TRAVEL DAY
Today is a travel day for me as I head to Abudban to work with Manwe for a spell. He has told me of a couple pilots to watch for there. I'll be reporting here on our work. Manwe and I have a little different approach. As a Minmatar, manwe reacts to the issue of violence a little different than I do. That is his focus. As a Caldari, greed is the issue I tend to confront. We will see how the combination works out.
The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Razgriz20
Posted - 2011.05.31 16:27:00 - [133]
 

Ston,
I must bid you farewell. My corp has decided to move to a new location so I will not be in the Piekura system for much longer. I wish you the best of luck on you and your corporations' quest for New Eden. Maybe one day in our future our paths will cross. I think we have both learned from each other with our time in the system and for this I thank you. Take care friend and fly safe.
May the solar winds always be at your back.
Best regards,
Razgriz20
P.S. If you get a chance some time take a look at my bio, I think you will enjoy it. Has to do with how I got my name :)

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.31 19:50:00 - [134]
 

Razgriz20, you have been one of the noble souls I have encountered in Piekura. Your presence will be deeply missed. I too wish you peace and joy in all your endeavors. I will read your bio and I sincerely hope that our paths do cross again. Until then, Peace.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.05.31 20:59:00 - [135]
 

CORPORATION NEWS: ENDOWMENT PRINCIPLE DOUBLED
I have doubled the principle of the Disciples of Ston Endowment. We should be able to open a second office when we find a suitable location.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.01 02:36:00 - [136]
 

FEAR
I do not have what one might call, "good empirical evidence," but my first impressions of Abudban is that it is a place dominated by fear. This fear generates violence. Violence generated by fear also can take the form of revenge. This is especially the case when people are afraid of those who have more power than they do. Vengeance is then taken on those with less power. That is where the Disciples of Ston come in. We present ourselves as a convenient target to the fearful. We are easy to destroy and we give a legal reason to do so; petty theft. We see the product of fear. As our thefts are petty, so are the violent responses.

Abudban is a fearful place. But... we have seen people recognise and overcome their fear. This is a place where our work is needed.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Jason Galente
Gallente
mishima ryu
Posted - 2011.06.01 02:54:00 - [137]
 

Originally by: Ston Momaki
I am Caldari, but I am Achura and I am a thief. I am an unskilled thief. While others train skills and strive for greatness or proficiency, I train no skills nor do I need to. I steal, plundering the hard work of others. I steel because I wish to discover your secrets; the secret of who you are. Despise me and reveal yourself! Destroy me, there is no loss for I return just as before. Back to steal again.


Do your best. My past and my future shall forever remain enshrouded in mystery. Also, since you already told me you are Caldari, telling me you are unskilled was redundant.


Aiwha
Caldari
101st Space Marine Force
Nulli Secunda
Posted - 2011.06.01 06:22:00 - [138]
 

Originally by: Ston Momaki
YOU DO NOT HAVE THE EYES OF A KILLER

Well, at least your avatar doesn't. Every now and then, but rarely, I will work in the morning so I meet new people I would otherwise miss. Today was such an occasion. I stole from a young women, who later contacted me for an explanation. She indicated that she did not mind me looting her wrecks. She went on to say that she experienced joy in killing. I pressed her on the issue by pointing out the contrast of putting the words "joy" and "killing" together. She retracted her earlier statement and revised her expression around the theme of self-defense. I closed our conversation with the headline at the beginning of this log.

As I reflect on this and other observations, I come to a preliminary conclusion that many pilots only pretend to be real "killers." It is part of the expected bravado of New Eden. If we don't project the persona of violence we will get trampled and not survive. When pressed, I think many capsuleers live with violence as a part of their lives but would not really choose to pair "joy" with "killing." Some do, obviously, but not all. Like this young lady, they enjoy mining and building and do not have the eyes of a killer.


I disagree. Everybody has a little psychopath in them that can nibble away at their restraint. It just needs a little bloodletting to whet its appetite.

Manwe Todako
Minmatar
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.01 20:37:00 - [139]
 

Its because you worked at night. Generally speaking, there is more violence here at night and people are more afraid and more violent. I have only worked at night a couple times because of my schedule and other duties, but I noticed a real difference. Glad you are here for a while.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.02 03:28:00 - [140]
 

BREATHING VIOLENCE LIKE AIR

The miners of Abudban are completely unnerved. A band of very violent pilots have been raiding the system and attacking miners, particularly in the ice-field. They claim that they are only attacking bots, but from the local chatter, it seems that the attacks are more indiscriminate. The losses are typically in the 200Mil ISK range as pilots are losing Macs and Hulks.

Whereas last night, I felt some reaction towards me in the form of violence, tonight all of local chatter was preoccupied with the violence going on. This kind of violence is definitely not the typical violence that pilots engage in with one another in relatively high security space. The pilots I saw attacking tonight had a minus 10 and minus 7.5 sec status. They are highly skilled in violence.

The Disciples of Ston may need to look for entirely different ways to help the people of Abudban at this time. Petty theft usually is a good provocateur, but not tonight. When an icefield is nearly empty of miners, because no one wants to risk the loss of their ships, petty theft doesn't move people much. The economies of scale have changed.

We feel for what is happening here. I only hope we can find a way to help somehow. I have sent a mail message to the pilot I believe to be the ring leader and offered the Disciples of Ston as a means to sate their lust for violence. I have my doubts if anything will come of that. But...we must try something.

I want to thank Dawn Aranu for working Piekura tonight. It is always good to know that there is a Disciple there in the home system. The Disciples of Ston are truly sorry for the huge losses experienced by the pilots of Abudban.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.02 13:06:00 - [141]
 

CORPORATE NEWS

Being new to the corporation management role, I still have a great deal to learn. For instance, I had no idea in the huge discrepency between office rental rates from system to system. I just opened an office in the neighboring system of Korama for only 10,000 ISK/mo. The piekura office is 10 mil/mo.

Its killin me to keep our HQ in Piekura when we could move it next door to a fraction of the cost.ugh

Manwe Todako
Minmatar
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.02 23:37:00 - [142]
 

I wish to take this oppotunity to apologise to Ston for how critical I was of him when he used some barely negative terminology to refer to some specific pilots in Piekura. I believe, "backyard bully" was the choice of words. I wish such words were sufficinet to describe what I have found in Rens. I do not know if I can describe the people here without attaching some kind of label. This place is a moral black hole. More later, when I can observe and think some more.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.03 03:03:00 - [143]
 

INSULTS AND BIGOTRY

But first...I have been waiting all day to read about Manwe's work in Rens. Sounds like it was very interesting. The hub idea is going to work, I think.

Now, back to topic. Today was an unusually high insult day in space. The insults usually involved identifying me as some form of female genitalia or a homosexual male. Whenever peace and non-violence are mentioned, these identifiers are used. I would think that any woman or homosexual would be outraged at such language. New Eden is tolerant in all the wrong ways. Violence and Bigotry is tolerated. Peace and non-violence are not tolerated.

topic two

ONLY THE PEACEFUL ARE FREE

The violent and greedy must lie continually to keep up the facade that is part of their existence. In the torrent of insults today, one pilot offered to pay 10 Mil ISK to anyone who killed me. I offered to come to the pilot so he could do it himself and keep his money. I found him and orbited him for a few minutes. He had a monster of a ship with eight turrets and host of ECM going. There I was in my Ibis. You see, he really didn't mean what he said. When it comes to true bravery, the violent and greedy are seen for what they are. All the bravado evaporates.

A peaceful man or woman need never lie or exaggerate. A man or woman of peace need never make false threats or be inflated in self-estimation. A person of peace is free to actual be himself. Peace does not require you to maintain a facade. Violence and greed always do.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.04 03:40:00 - [144]
 

THE STRAW MAN

I have been watching with great eagerness, the reflections of Manwe as he works in Rens. Tonight, he hit upon something I have seen over and over again, the use of the straw man. Below is a quote from part of his log for tonight.

quote:
The most common straw man that caps use is religion. I have come to the conclusion that caps have a love/hate relationship with religion. It seems to hold them in bonds and they hate it, yet they love to talk about it. Back to the Straw man. Just as soon as you get too close to their greed or violence or weakness, or lack of bravery, they will identify you as religious; that's the straw man that is easy to ridicule, deny, persecute and dismiss. Ah, now I don't have to deal with my anger, greed, violence, and self-deception. I can focus on knocking down the straw man. It is the oldest logical fallacy on the books.


I had originally thought about addressing why capsuleers enjoy the failure of others, but I will leave that for another time.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.05 02:45:00 - [145]
 

WHEN I AM VERY GLAD TO BE WRONG

At the conclusion of my time in Abudban when I was preparing to set out for Piekura, I decided to take one more spin around the patch. I had reflected on what I was going to write about tonight, what themes to focus on, what aspects of human nature to accent. Then it happened...I had one last conversation. That conversation filled me with humbleness and joy. Humbleness, because it showed me I was wrong about what I had planned to say; joy, because it showed me that there are noble people around and one needs to stay hopeful.

In every conversation up to that point, I had heard profanity, sexual crudity, insult, and just bad logic. This conversation began as a light debate over what is interesting or boring in life. The subject ranged on into the issue of peace vs violence, etc., etc; typical fare for a "Disciples of Ston" conversation. What struck me after about three exchanges was this: The person used no profanity, no crude sexual remarks, no straw man arguments, no insults. We simple spoke back and forth about our observations, values, and opinions. After a bit, I literally felt encouraged. I didn't change his mind, and he didn't change my values. But, HE DID CHANGE MY MIND about what I had intended to write.

The preceding days were so characterized by the lowest and basest elements of humanity, that I was about to make some pretty judgmental generalizations about all or most pilots. The line between idealism and arrogance is thin, and sometimes the Disciples of Ston cross the line. It is one of the perils of our work. I feel gratitude that I was stopped from crossing the line by one last conversation in Abudban.

We can find reason, self control, respect, and honor among those with whom we have differences of value. I just hope I don't become to cynical to look for it.

I won't use the person's name to protect his privacy,but if you read this, a Big Thank you from Ston Momaki.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.06 02:21:00 - [146]
 

DO I HAVE TO? AND HOW LONG?

Edaine has ask me to temporarily take over management of the corporation. He says that he needs to leave to corp for a while so he can get jump clones,whatever that means. Anyway, I would have to train three skills. This is not what the Disciples do and it seems like a distraction. Edaine needs to be able to do what he has to do and he has promised to resume his role as soon as possible. He will be contacting Manwe and Dawn about it soon.

It is important that we keep faith with our members, few as they are. Edaine says he needs to work out the details regarding the endowment and how to to transfer roles to me. Since he is new at this, he says it may take some time to figure out.

In the mean time, I am free to keep working as I have been.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.06 22:24:00 - [147]
 

CORPORATE NEWS

I will be temporarily leaving the corporation to pursue the installation of jump clones at three locations. Ston is CEO in my absence, but insisted that he not be called CEO, so we have created the title, "steward." As soon as I finish what I need to do, I will rejoin the corporation and resume my role as CEO.

Edaine

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.08 02:41:00 - [148]
 

GIVING IS A LOT MORE FUN THAN TAKING

Two experiences confirmed this to me tonight. The first experience took place in Piekura and the second in Korama. In the local com channel, someone was asking how to get isogen. Apparently, he needed quite a lot. The Disciples are urged to give when they can. These gifts are usually small, because we do not accumulate ISK, but happen upon it in smaller amounts through reprocessing what we steal. I had a few 100K ISK and bout 9999 units of isogen and gave it to the man via contract. It was fun. He was surprised and grateful.

The end goal of the Disciples' thieving is so that we might give something of deaper value, i.e., freedom from greed, violence, selfishness, and fear. Sometimes we are successful, but more often, not. These human nature obstacles are difficult to overcome. Taking from people isn't always as fun as some might believe.

The second experience involved tipping a can of pyroxeries in Korama from a jet can miner. You cant secure cans in Korama, so you are at risk if you jet can. I retitled that can and tried to get the pilot to talk. He left and forgot his acolytes. I took those and tried to get in a conversation. Nothing doing. Eventually I blued the can and opened it up on local channel. He returned and took his stuff, but gave me no opportunity to give him something better or to receive from him something non-material.

I certainly enjoyed the first experience more and will look for more opportunities like it in the future. However, it is the first pilot that we really want to reach. Such a challenge.

Edaine Numenor
Gallente
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.08 14:48:00 - [149]
 

Corporation News:
I am now back with the Disciples of Ston as CEO. In less than 48 hours, I was able to instal jump clones in all four major sovereignties. These I will use for my own agenda as well as assist the Disciples in the rapid scouting of systems that may be good places for them to work.

When I founded this corp, I did so as a rookie pilot with minimal training. I saw jump clones as a tool that could assist us and make us efficient. The requirement of an 8.0 standing with the corp cloning facility make the process prohibitive for rookie pilots, unless...

This is why I had to leave the Disciples of Ston for a short period. There is a service called Estel Arador Corp Services I highly, highly recommend them if you want to jump start your acquisition of jump clones. Once you train Infomorph, join the corp and instal your clones. It is that simple.

Ston Momaki
Caldari
Disciples of Ston
Posted - 2011.06.10 02:39:00 - [150]
 

I THINK THOU DOST PROTEST TOO MUCH

Here is a typical Disciple of Ston conversation... five minutes in, the subject says that he doesn't care about you or about what you have to say. Ten minutes later we are still talking when he says that I am irrelevant. Fifteen minutes later, he declares that he is ignoring me. We go on talking for yet another fifteen minutes for a grand total of 45 minutes of conversation. During that time numerous attempts are made by the subject to make me angry through insults of various sorts. The subject matter captivates the pilot for 45 minutes and yet he must remind himself and me that he is ignoring me and doesn't care about what I have to say or that I take an interest in his thoughts and life.

All of the Disciples have encountered this irony in our work. I would like to be able to say that we always succeed in giving our subjects the gift we desire to give; the gift of self-knowledge, but this in not the case. For 45 minutes, I endeavored to open the intractable lock of stubbornness to no avail...maybe...

Who knows but perhaps inside, some ground was gained. Ground won back to sanity from the insanity of greed, violence, unforgiveness, bitterness, loneliness, isolation, and pretense.

Another difficulty encountered tonight was the impossibility of trying to focus on two individuals at once. There was a great possibility of having two focused conversations at the same time, but alas I found myself needing to direct my attention to only one. I hope to encounter these individuals again, but that has yet to be seen.

Strange enough, the Disciples of Ston depend upon strangers who have no awareness of what we do and our underlying purpose to pass through the systems where we work. Such was the case tonight, and it played out well. I only wish for the freedom of peace in the mind and heart and soul of the very angry person I talked to tonight.

The Disciples of Ston bid you peace and good night.


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