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blankseplocked EVE is suffering from a SUCK epidemic of unprecedented proportion.
 
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Kora Zilesti
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:09:00 - [1]
 

Edited by: Kora Zilesti on 04/04/2011 00:13:21
In order to give appropriate terminology to this plague, I have termed it "SUCKS". Severe Unavoidable Combat Knuckle-under Syndrome. SUCK Syndrome has affected thousands of EVE players, and is characterized by a decrease in testicular fortitude, acute lack of willingness to PvP, the obsessive use of neutral repair in every empire conflict, and a greatly increased tendency to only engage pilots that have absolutely no chance of winning. Advanced stages of SUCK may also include compulsive fitting of warp-stabs and extreme paranoia.

So given my clinical analysis of this medical issue, I've come to refer with you, my colleagues, in order to get to the bottom of this.

No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.
No longer are there true solo pilots or small gangs roaming the great space-plains of EVE.
No longer are there fleets without cloaked scouts or neutral alts watching every entry point or route of travel for three systems.
No longer are there 1v1 challengers without four guardians and two bump-Machariels waiting to warp in or undock.

What happened, EVE? I remember this game not being full of SUCK once.

Cipher Jones
Minmatar
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:16:00 - [2]
 

And people wonder why the internet boils down to "UMAD BRUH?" and "COOL STORY IBTL".

Corina's Bodyguard
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:16:00 - [3]
 

I do not suffer from this syndrome, and would gladly challenge you to a 1v1... even though I am almost guaranteed to lose. I fail at PvP.Sad

Autaris Valaar
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:16:00 - [4]
 

Darwinism Happened. People adapted to achieve victory or survival with the least possible input of resources whilst achieving the greatest potential gains.

You are the last of your dying sub-species of EVE player, and you will be preserved for posterity as a lesson to others who refuse to adapt to changing circumstances.

Also mandatory 'LOL solo pvp' comment.

Kora Zilesti
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:18:00 - [5]
 

Originally by: Cipher Jones
And people wonder why the internet boils down to "UMAD BRUH?" and "COOL STORY IBTL".
...probably because of a lack of ability to think up a comment that actually engages anyone's attention over the age of twelve? Rolling Eyes

Just my guess.

Nypheas Azurai
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:27:00 - [6]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.

Yes because lowsec miners should just be waiting for you to point and pew them casually without effort at your leisure. Apparently the SUCK is you.

Kora Zilesti
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:31:00 - [7]
 

Edited by: Kora Zilesti on 04/04/2011 00:32:12
Originally by: Nypheas Azurai
Originally by: Kora Zilesti
No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.

Yes because lowsec miners should just be waiting for you to point and pew them casually without effort at your leisure. Apparently the SUCK is you.
I didn't say "lowsec miners." When you warp into a belt and there's a pilot there who's equally matched to you, and he instawarps because you're not a 100% certain kill, that's SUCK.

I'm not interested in popping miners and ratters. I got over the whole 'killboard stuffing' obsession a long time ago.

Nypheas Azurai
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:37:00 - [8]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
I didn't say "lowsec miners." When you warp into a belt and there's a pilot there who's equally matched to you, and he instawarps because you're not a 100% certain kill, that's SUCK.

I'm sorry, let me rephrase:
Yes because ANY SHIP in lowsec should just be waiting for you to point and pew them casually without effort at your leisure.

Caldari Citizen20090217
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:49:00 - [9]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
I didn't say "lowsec miners." When you warp into a belt and there's a pilot there who's equally matched to you, and he instawarps because you're not a 100% certain kill, that's SUCK.

I'm not interested in popping miners and ratters. I got over the whole 'killboard stuffing' obsession a long time ago.

OK I'll bite. He insta warps because:

  • you might have a cyno and drop OVER 9000 capships on him

  • you may have friends on route either in system or next door

  • becuse of falcon, or rr alts

  • it takes too long to kill him/you (nerf buffer tanks) and in that time help will arrive

  • he is in a belt. If ratting he is pve fit so will die to your pvp setup. Plus he has to tank rats as well as you

  • you engaged him. Therefore you thought you could win. From his perspective, what do you know that he doesn't?

  • Refitting a ship is a pain if the local market is sucky

  • killboards.



Neoexecutor
Minmatar
Skynet Technologies
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:56:00 - [10]
 

Well written/witty op. No go and write up on a medical condition that's preventing you to adapt to a changing system that Eve is.

Kora Zilesti
Posted - 2011.04.04 00:58:00 - [11]
 

Originally by: Caldari Citizen20090217
Originally by: Kora Zilesti
I didn't say "lowsec miners." When you warp into a belt and there's a pilot there who's equally matched to you, and he instawarps because you're not a 100% certain kill, that's SUCK.

I'm not interested in popping miners and ratters. I got over the whole 'killboard stuffing' obsession a long time ago.

OK I'll bite. He insta warps because:

  • you might have a cyno and drop OVER 9000 capships on him

  • you may have friends on route either in system or next door

  • becuse of falcon, or rr alts

  • it takes too long to kill him/you (nerf buffer tanks) and in that time help will arrive

  • he is in a belt. If ratting he is pve fit so will die to your pvp setup. Plus he has to tank rats as well as you

  • you engaged him. Therefore you thought you could win. From his perspective, what do you know that he doesn't?

  • Refitting a ship is a pain if the local market is sucky

  • killboards.



And the fact that he has to be so rightfully paranoid is a very significant sign that SUCK syndrome has taken a heavy toll. Nobody's willing to be a gambler when it comes to PvP anymore. Not said pilot in a belt, and not the million and one pilots that would love to engage him with a 30-man fleet.

Montgomery Crabapple
Posted - 2011.04.04 01:05:00 - [12]
 

There was never any honour in Eve PvP. Anyone remember Space Invaders? The OP's nostalgia is a false memory.

Dr Richard Dawkins
Posted - 2011.04.04 01:07:00 - [13]
 

People have a real rosy-colored view of eve pre-dominion. I'm guessing that's because they didn't play back then.

Mel Lifera
Gallente
Ambrye Logistics Ltd.
Posted - 2011.04.04 01:08:00 - [14]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
Edited by: Kora Zilesti on 04/04/2011 00:13:21
In order to give appropriate terminology to this plague, I have termed it "SUCKS". Severe Unavoidable Combat Knuckle-under Syndrome. SUCK Syndrome has affected thousands of EVE players, and is characterized by a decrease in testicular fortitude, acute lack of willingness to PvP, the obsessive use of neutral repair in every empire conflict, and a greatly increased tendency to only engage pilots that have absolutely no chance of winning. Advanced stages of SUCK may also include compulsive fitting of warp-stabs and extreme paranoia.

So given my clinical analysis of this medical issue, I've come to refer with you, my colleagues, in order to get to the bottom of this.

No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.
No longer are there true solo pilots or small gangs roaming the great space-plains of EVE.
No longer are there fleets without cloaked scouts or neutral alts watching every entry point or route of travel for three systems.
No longer are there 1v1 challengers without four guardians and two bump-Machariels waiting to warp in or undock.

What happened, EVE? I remember this game not being full of SUCK once.


So you're upset because this is EVE and you'd rather be playing Lethal Enforcers?

Renan Ruivo
Hipernova
Vera Cruz Alliance
Posted - 2011.04.04 02:10:00 - [15]
 

PvP'er tears... Exquisite.

Kora Zilesti
Posted - 2011.04.04 02:37:00 - [16]
 

Originally by: Dr Richard Dawkins
People have a real rosy-colored view of eve pre-dominion. I'm guessing that's because they didn't play back then.
Early '08.

Elyssa MacLeod
Posted - 2011.04.04 04:40:00 - [17]
 

lol @ ppl that refuse to adapt in a MMO

Lengram
Posted - 2011.04.04 05:11:00 - [18]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
Not said pilot in a belt, and not the million and one pilots that would love to engage him with a 30-man fleet.


eve doesnt have a million pilots, there are only 320k active accounts

Antihrist Pripravnik
Scorpion Road Industry
Posted - 2011.04.04 05:46:00 - [19]
 

Edited by: Antihrist Pripravnik on 04/04/2011 05:48:03
Originally by: Kora Zilesti

No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.
No longer are there true solo pilots or small gangs roaming the great space-plains of EVE.
No longer are there fleets without cloaked scouts or neutral alts watching every entry point or route of travel for three systems.
No longer are there 1v1 challengers without four guardians and two bump-Machariels waiting to warp in or undock.


- Yes, there are. Bait Drakes.
- Yes, there are. Change the environment, find another part of space or another group of players that do this.
- And you say THEY are paranoid.
- Then stop fighting against RR-ers and find yourself another target. (If you think that's not possible, refer to the point above).

Ban Doga
Posted - 2011.04.04 05:57:00 - [20]
 

Originally by: Kora Zilesti
Edited by: Kora Zilesti on 04/04/2011 00:32:12
Originally by: Nypheas Azurai
Originally by: Kora Zilesti
No longer are there ships in lowsec asteroid belts that aren't aligned for warp.

Yes because lowsec miners should just be waiting for you to point and pew them casually without effort at your leisure. Apparently the SUCK is you.
I didn't say "lowsec miners." When you warp into a belt and there's a pilot there who's equally matched to you, and he instawarps because you're not a 100% certain kill, that's SUCK.

I'm not interested in popping miners and ratters. I got over the whole 'killboard stuffing' obsession a long time ago.


What else are you expecting to find in a belt?
Other people not looking for miners and ratters?

Tentacle Monster
New Eden Trade Union
Posted - 2011.04.04 06:34:00 - [21]
 

Edited by: Tentacle Monster on 04/04/2011 06:34:51
'Be paranoid' is like the moral lesson of EVE Online. And that's coming from a 90% carebear. I'd probably lose it if I spent any time in 0.0.

Burial Day
Anti-citizen One
Posted - 2011.04.04 06:46:00 - [22]
 

hello morons,

stop talking about "adaptation."

the reason we "adapt" to real life is that we can only change the system so much; after we have reached the limits of environment manipulation (i.e., making the environment "easier" to win in), we need to change ourselves.

virtual reality is 100% controllable. We don't have to adapt to it; the developers can make it anything they want.

the OP is not UNABLE to "adapt" - he just wants the game to improve. Stop acting as if EVE is something outside of human control. It could be a much better game than it is now.

Avette Aylet
Posted - 2011.04.04 06:57:00 - [23]
 

Here's a basic rule of warfare in general:

If you ever find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck.

Better Than You
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:01:00 - [24]
 

What is with you people and your obsession with pee vee pee? Maybe back in the day many years ago you savages had to do that with everything in the galaxy, but while you were crying yourself to sleep over dying to carebears, the game did something you could not understand. EVE evolved.

Yes I know its had for you old farts but the game evolved and left you behind. It got better and better. And you know what? It did it without you 1337 pee vee pee skills. Time to face the music. The number of subscribers keeps growing because, zomg, everything doesn't revolve around PvP.

Aside from the worst patch ever to hit the server on the 5th, the right people control space and those who are confused with nostalgia sit in high sec crying bitter tears remembering the good old days. Suck on that! Very Happy

Suitonia
Gallente
Genos Occidere
HYDRA RELOADED
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:01:00 - [25]
 

EVE's version of Wrath Syndrome

Dorian Tormak
M0N0LITH
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:07:00 - [26]
 

What R talking about ?

FeralShadow
NME1
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:11:00 - [27]
 

Just because everybody's been forced to adapt to Eve PVP in this way (see: NO MOMMA I WONT PVP WITHOUT BLOBS) doesn't mean it's a good thing.

Yes, people are being forced more and more to be super paranoid, never engage without crazy good odds, or simply to not engage. This is in response to how PVP has evolved with the introduction of T3's, warp to zero, T3 bs's (think abaddon), HACS, probably most important recons, and the prevalence of capital ships. Was it inevitable? Probably. Is that how people are playing now and how they probably will play for the forseable future? Likely.

Again, is it a GOOD thing for this game? Absolutely not.

Suitonia
Gallente
Genos Occidere
HYDRA RELOADED
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:24:00 - [28]
 

I think it's a case of people being bad at the game and not wanting to fight as opposed to thinking I have a dirty trick up my sleeve. I often solo in 0.0 in an interceptor, my alliance has no capitals, I'm solo and they know it based on their intel and scouting me, searching me on a killboard shows that I'm solo all of the time when I'm not in an alliance gang, and I've never used cynos, not that I can even use them on this character.

I think the problem is that there is no incentive to fight. Theres no reason for them to try and remove me apart from keeping them running their anomalys in one system and locking it down for a bit, they can't blob or camp me in based on my ship choice, which is the only pvp they often are capable of. The only way to get to these players is to use AFK cloaking, which isn't really my type of PvP since I prefer to be agressive and roam, and also look at how many forum whines there is about it...

Go to some regions like Esotoria and Impass, theres like 80 active guys in the entire region, but they dock up and won't fight 1 woman in an interceptor. I really wish there was some kind of small gang mechanic that you could do that would encourage people to fight you. However there is none.

Kyra Felann
Gallente
The Scope
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:30:00 - [29]
 

Originally by: Autaris Valaar
Darwinism Happened. People adapted to achieve victory or survival with the least possible input of resources whilst achieving the greatest potential gains.

You are the last of your dying sub-species of EVE player, and you will be preserved for posterity as a lesson to others who refuse to adapt to changing circumstances.


This. PvP combat should be more like warfare and less like e-honor duels.

Strategy in warfare means maximizing your chances for victory while minimizing your opponent's. I see nothing wrong with this.

As the saying goes, in EVE, if you're in a fair right, it means you did something wrong.

CCP Spitfire


C C P
C C P Alliance
Posted - 2011.04.04 07:33:00 - [30]
 

Moved from 'EVE General Discussion'.



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