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Chromoys
Posted - 2010.06.29 20:28:00 - [61]
 

Always thought the stuff kinda tasted like a$$...

Now I'd rather just not think about it. ugh

Nice chron, though!

Cheers!

Baroshi Hynas
Gallente
The Exploratory Project
Posted - 2010.06.29 20:44:00 - [62]
 

Besides the part about the heartless capsuleer (why does CCP think that all capsuleers lost their humanity???) I liked it.

Now, my turn for Quafe+ quotes Twisted Evil

Quafe+, made from 100% carebear.
Quafe+, fuel the Pirate in you.
Quafe+, now with more carebear in every can!
Quafe+, buy a 10 pack and receive a limited edition Hulkageddon mug!

Vereesa
Gallente
THORN Syndicate
THORN Alliance
Posted - 2010.06.29 21:27:00 - [63]
 

Awesome chronicle. I like the way its all in diaries and letters and transcripts. Reminds me of Dracula.

Quafe+ It's to die for!

Louella Dougans
Amarr
Sovereign Hospitaller Order of Saint Katherine
Posted - 2010.06.29 21:53:00 - [64]
 

Originally by: Evanda Char
Mr. Itis, you are a wonderfully sick man. Thought the text was nicely nuanced, too.

Originally by: Nathan Jameson

Also, I thought from one of the in-game missions that Quafe+ was actually made using a psychotropic drug. But maybe I'm thinking of something else.


You could make psychotropic drugs out of some parts of the human body. Adrenochrome seems a likely candidate, but for something more subtle and like the effect in the story, I'd point at either the pineal or, more likely, the pituitary gland.



It;s Quafe Unleashed that was the ingame thing.

http://wiki.eveonline.com/en/wiki/Quafe_Unleashed_formula

iirc it was something to do with mind-control o.0

KoffeeKup
Caldari
Gh0st Hunters
Sspectre
Posted - 2010.06.29 22:22:00 - [65]
 

Hmmmm....... So...

Quafe drinks are made out of Drugs, Garbage, and Dead people? Well, i think we found out how to solve the worlds problems. Think about it! Its the greenest solution ever! Turn all that bad stuff into food for the masses! The hippies should be happy! Its totally a gallente way of thinking! Next they will be using human waste and calling it Quafe Flush, It sure tastes like ****!
I mean, Tastes like AWESOME!

Cyron Logus
Minmatar
Pator Tech School
Posted - 2010.06.30 00:51:00 - [66]
 

Edited by: Cyron Logus on 30/06/2010 00:52:20
Awesome story! But I'm going to have to say that, hands down, the best part are all of the hilarious Quafe slogans being posted! My turn!

Quafe+: Put a little human in you...
Quafe+: Flavor that's more than skin deep...
Quafe+: Now with 'No Pulp'!
Quafe+: Recharge with someone's final discharge...
Quafe+: It IS you!

And finally: have commercials sort of like Bush's Baked Beans with Duke the cadaver dog constantly trying to find the secret ingredient...

Astenion
Gallente
Spiritus Draconis
Posted - 2010.06.30 01:16:00 - [67]
 

Great read...one of my favorites so far.

Quafe+: "You people eat Marmite and you're complaining about OUR additives?"

Quafe+: "Admit it: you've always wanted to be a zombie."

Quafe+: "For the cannibal necrophiliac in everyone"

Lusulpher
Gallente
Posted - 2010.06.30 03:46:00 - [68]
 

Edited by: Lusulpher on 30/06/2010 03:48:25
Edited by: Lusulpher on 30/06/2010 03:47:11
Originally by: MechaMouse
That story made me very thirsty.




Yeah, and these slogans aren't helping...

Quafe+ Just do it!

Quafe+ Do the duuuu-de.

Quafe+ Quenching the urge to consume all of Humanity.

Quafe+, best with fava beans and a nice chianti.

QuafeFUBU, For us, by us.[a subsidiary product of Quafe]

Quafe+, it was people...

Quafe+, from the makers of Bachelor Chow.

Quafe+ Get a little captain in ya...



Backdrop on cannibalism: Anyway in RL history sailors have ingested human flesh by accident[foreign encounter] or on purpose[the marooning of a whaling ships' crew by the whale later known as "Moby ****"]. It even has a nickname, "long pork"[bacon strips made from human thigh meat, sweet, sweet thigh meat...]
My ancestors supposedly ate the hearts of their fallen enemies, to consume the soul of a worthy opponent[and to scare the **** out of the survivors!] It works.[last island to be conquered in the chain, \o/ and they slapped on an exile to weaken our warrior mentality, :much pride: ]

The real question is: why did God recycle the flesh of pigs to make Humans? Did God own a copy of Animal Farm... Or maybe Deliverance? Twisted Evil

Once again, an appropriate PsyFi atmosphere for EvE.[we will digest the naysayers Mad]
4.0/4.5

Xaeyl
Posted - 2010.07.01 07:51:00 - [69]
 

[email protected]

Quafe+, You're next.
Quafe+, One sip for your Mum, One Giant gulp for your Aunt Bunny.


Urbricht Tremadog
Posted - 2010.07.01 10:40:00 - [70]
 

...In Soviet Russia, Quafe+ drinks you!

...I'll get my coat. Razz

Ultin Harvor
Gallente
Kafka Enterprises
Posted - 2010.07.01 14:11:00 - [71]
 

Quafe+: We are with you all the way.
Quafe+: It wouldn't be the same without you.
Quafe+: Get involved.
Quafe+: Now with more body.

Bobaflex Doomwalker
Gallente
Conclave United
Posted - 2010.07.02 08:36:00 - [72]
 

I love it. Really, I do.

Meleric
Caldari
Verteidiger des wahren Bloedsinns
Universal Constant Alliance
Posted - 2010.07.02 14:51:00 - [73]
 

Yeah, a great writing again !

But I have to agree with some, that this is a very dark painting of EVE you made here. Intrigues and other dodges are good to read too ... ;-)

Keep up the good work with this Chronicles !

Dracnys
Caldari
Posted - 2010.07.02 22:22:00 - [74]
 

Great chronicle! I always suspected that Quafe had some evil secret, they're Gallente after all.

Quafe+: Closing the circle of life
Quafe+: Now with 100% more brains
Quafe+: 100% bone-free


Tsunasis
Caldari
Posted - 2010.07.03 12:49:00 - [75]
 

Quafe+: Because You're Worth It!
Quafe+: Treat Yourself to the Best in Life!
Quafe+: Taste Greatness!
Quafe+: Escape From Your Troubles Today!

Creed Richards
Minmatar
Xoth Inc
Omega Vector
Posted - 2010.07.08 03:50:00 - [76]
 

...

That chronicle...is...just...wrong.

Darnoken
Posted - 2010.07.11 08:03:00 - [77]
 

Quote:
We have added more ships to our fleet and expanded our harvesting range to include Republic space.


Quafe+, the taste of freedom

Eipok Kruden
Caldari
Tadakastu-Obata Corporation
The Honda Accord
Posted - 2010.07.11 21:13:00 - [78]
 

Countless Caldari died in the making of this amazing drink, so be a patriot and drink Quafe+ today! Win the war, one sip at a time!

Typhado3
Minmatar
Posted - 2010.07.11 21:34:00 - [79]
 

Quote:
An excerpt from a speech by Gheyr Aillon toinvestors:


Quote:
Dasegne Oleart, InternalAffairs, Quafe Corpoartion


Very nice chron. I wonder if any of my corpses ended up in one of those drinks.

Dereck Drebin
Posted - 2010.07.12 15:02:00 - [80]
 

They're drinking her.........and then they're going to drink me! Oh my GAAAAAWWWWD!

m3talc0re X
Caldari
SandStorm.
The Babylon Consortium
Posted - 2010.07.20 13:37:00 - [81]
 

This reminds me of the drink from the Oddworld series...
http://oddworldlibrary.net/toe/SoulStorm_Brew

Reikenji Saito
Gallente
Tironci Culvarin Inc.
Posted - 2010.07.28 11:25:00 - [82]
 

Edited by: Reikenji Saito on 28/07/2010 11:25:47
Quafe+, because you need somewhere to hide your ex's body.

Quafe+, because breast feeding just wasn't enough.

Quafe+, inbibing your descendants with your essence.

Good read. Cool

Rei

::edited for spelling error::

Sketchy McGillis
Posted - 2010.08.01 02:58:00 - [83]
 

Edited by: Sketchy McGillis on 01/08/2010 02:58:00
Originally by: Chromoys
Always thought the stuff kinda tasted like a$$...

Now I'd rather just not think about it. ugh

Nice chron, though!

Cheers!


you probably just got a bad can, lol! Indeed a great read though!

Marcus Gideon
Gallente
Federal Defense Operations
Posted - 2010.08.20 20:00:00 - [84]
 

Quafe+
The flavor varies from person to person?

Ghost Rider86
Caldari
Posted - 2010.08.22 08:28:00 - [85]
 

Edited by: Ghost Rider86 on 22/08/2010 08:30:34
Quafe+, Blood raiders approve
Quafe+, Feed the beast in you
Quafe+, Feed the Great White Shark in you(r aquarium)!
Quafe+, Listen to your thirst
Quafe+, You know you like it
Quafe+, Hannibal Lecter's favourite Drink
Quafe+, If your plane crashes on snowy mountain
Quafe+, When all is left is bones
Quafe diet+, Loose weight, keep the proteins (Anorexia nervosa approved)
Quafe+, Down to the Bone
Quafe+ for men, "It gave me 3 inches!"
Quafe+ for women, "I wear D-cup now!"
Quafe+ for stupid, Made from scientists
Quafe Dog+, SURPRISE!

Ae0lian
Caldari
Militaris Industries
Damu'Khonde
Posted - 2010.08.23 05:04:00 - [86]
 

Quafe+ IS MADE OF PEOPLE!


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