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blankseplocked Offering my failcascade services
 
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Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 21:25:00 - [1]
 

Is your alliance and or corporation falling appart. For a modest fee, 500 million isk [it's for the luzs but it's a real service], contact me in game. Check my employment history and you will notice that I have been in one fail corp/alliance after another. The sole exception was suddenly ninjas which rocks and would never salvage from someone else's wrechs that they themselves didn't kill. 0/ Tcsh, never did make it back but was fun times being camped by 15 BSs for my lowly vexor.

If there is no demand for the service I'll eventually stop bumping it. But a serious look at my history and or kill board and you'll see I'm fail and been in failed corps and alliances all my life. Yet when I call for a sucide op to invade rancer in noob ships I get Xs. And usually the ones that get podded are then ones begging for another luz op like that.

I've never held sov, but I have taken down 4 POSes, pretty good for a hulk flying carebear. [I don't fly a hulk and hate mining, there free lesson humor, use it!]. Real rates will be negotiated based on size of corporation. If you are a noob corp, say under 10 members and CEO is under 6 months old I'll even consider offering the first "lessons" for free. And if you think it's worth continuing meeting we can work out a fee based on you resources and frequency of new "lessons".

The initial consultation will always be free. [Sorry for the wall of text I'm making this up as I go along {really and yes also still a joke, ask any of my 40 ish corpmates who left my last failed corp cause the CEO was a *ick and joined me, ask them y they X up when I blue failed coalitions ask em really I don't know but I can tell u whatever it is it works kinda, and I figure sandbox and since logistical Nightmares seems to have worked, another production of suddenly ninjas [Tch can I haz isk yet???] why not try my idea and see if I can make more isk than hunting wormholes [tried it after the patch it was meh, and people stopped exing up for it so for some reason it doesn't work in my corp so... sucide = good, billions of isk begging to be exploited = bad? Why I don't know. But it seems to work for me and maybe I can teach you.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 21:25:00 - [2]
 

Second, and my first second [ it's like your soo goodlucking from Scienfield it was funny on the show but really won't be adopted IRL]

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 21:26:00 - [3]
 

reserved

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 21:27:00 - [4]
 

reserved is that how u spell it [remember humor! use it]

Everybruce
Posted - 2009.06.30 21:27:00 - [5]
 

first to say.... what?

Madam Scarlette
Caldari
Knights of Destruction
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:11:00 - [6]
 

This is the best example of saying a bunch of words and not saying anything at all.
You sir would make a great politician.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:20:00 - [7]
 

No I will not be your president! but thanks for saying I have leadership qualities feel free to ping me if/when you would like to hear more about my services. And/or if you wardec a fail corp send me my way after the cascade is nearly complete. Don't completely empty em, just when they stop logging, not when their numbers plumet cause that is almost always too late unless CEO/highly energetic "key" person has like 12 hrs a day to rebuild. And quit making me spill my guts! I'll never have anything to teach my customers later. There coming right??? I was promised if you post it they will come. [once again can never have 2 much humor even lame humor will get sucide fleets Xing again].

Verx Interis
Amarr
SkyNet.
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:20:00 - [8]
 

can you just tl;dr what you actually do?

FOl2TY8
GoonWaffe
Goonswarm Federation
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:27:00 - [9]
 

Originally by: Verx Interis
can you just tl;dr what you actually do?


Maybe you hire him and he will make sure the corp fails, not through corp theft but through infiltrated retardation?

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:31:00 - [10]
 

I'm making it up as I go along. Other therad, I've seen corps fail and I've stopped my corp from failing like 6 times and my ex alliance 4 times. Eventually my old CEO the *ick came back. I was considering jumping ship anyways but stuck around for 2 months cause didn't want alliance to fail after all that work. Another alliance cascade started and this time I was burnt out and didn't even try stopping it. So when to boot CEO didn't log on for 2 months I jumpped ship, emptied the corp wallet, sup Guiding hands you guys approve?, and made a new corp. Offered all active members, those that ever were active before RL was a problem a place in the corp. inactive members that eventually realized nobody was still logging on were banned from new corp.

New corp originally started with 35 is players and without me succesfully recruiting a new player [I tried but seem to have lost my touch] or actually appointing a new personell officer we are now @ 40 ish. RL friends were brought in, people they kinda knew from nub corps were brought in etc. So even without me needing to be crazy active, sup trying to finish my PhD thesis this summer and not being here another semester, I have a mostly succesful corp carebear corp with about half of them always looking to X up for suicide fleet. Hek I don't even lead the fleets any more.

... crap I'm rambling, it's the insomnia I tell you.

tl&dr [which means what btw?] Would you like your corp to grow. Or do you think your corp is faiding. I might be able to help [for a price] and your first consoltation is free and at that time we work out the details.

Madam Scarlette
Caldari
Knights of Destruction
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:34:00 - [11]
 

oh...so you're anti-fail,
thats not as interesting.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.06.30 22:44:00 - [12]
 

Originally by: Madam Scarlette
oh...so you're anti-fail,
thats not as interesting.
Look at it this way, if I'm succesful you mercs have more gfs. Less your just griefers then u can always go to noob systems and type in local free stuff
here take this.

Daain
Caldari
Science and Trade Institute
Posted - 2009.07.01 11:45:00 - [13]
 

Captain Ritalin wondered off again....anyone seen him around?

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.01 12:07:00 - [14]
 

Originally by: Daain
Captain Ritalin wondered off again....anyone seen him around?
No, but I'll keep looking and have him give you a call if I find him.

War Kitten
Panda McLegion
Posted - 2009.07.01 12:34:00 - [15]
 

Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:36:01
Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:33:59
Originally by: Jimmy Duce
... ramble ramble <snip>...

tl&dr [which means what btw?]



tl;dr = too long; didn't read

Your posting is an extreme example of it, señor ramblomatic.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.01 15:20:00 - [16]
 

Originally by: War Kitten
Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:36:01
Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:33:59
Originally by: Jimmy Duce
... ramble ramble <snip>...

tl&dr [which means what btw?]



tl;dr = too long; didn't read

Your posting is an extreme example of it, señor ramblomatic.
... The need to fix these forums. Had good response to u tl&dr if u know of someone who ur about to cause a cascade in lemme know.

Vespa Maru
Minmatar
Varion Galactic
OWN Alliance
Posted - 2009.07.01 16:51:00 - [17]
 

Originally by: Jimmy Duce
Originally by: War Kitten
Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:36:01
Edited by: War Kitten on 01/07/2009 12:33:59
Originally by: Jimmy Duce
... ramble ramble <snip>...

tl&dr [which means what btw?]



tl;dr = too long; didn't read

Your posting is an extreme example of it, señor ramblomatic.
... The need to fix these forums. Had good response to u tl&dr if u know of someone who ur about to cause a cascade in lemme know.


You sir are a strange and bizarre little man.

Grimrian
Cash Money Brothers
Posted - 2009.07.01 23:01:00 - [18]
 

I think he's the Dr. Phil of eve..
Just give it time, and he'll end up offering group therapy to gank victims.

just imagineRolling Eyes


Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.01 23:35:00 - [19]
 

Still lfg, actually first customer. Don't be shy. Try the intiall offering nothuing to lose and I'm descrete.

PaRaZiTuRL
Amarr
IDLE GUNS
IDLE EMPIRE
Posted - 2009.07.02 09:27:00 - [20]
 

I am looking to hire you for your outstanding services as a personal imaginary friend.I don't have 500 m though.I only have 5.

Let me know.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.02 11:33:00 - [21]
 

Originally by: PaRaZiTuRL
I am looking to hire you for your outstanding services as a personal imaginary friend.I don't have 500 m though.I only have 5.

Let me know.
Currently busy trying to acomplish the impossible with goons. If there not impressed with our last act... It's all down hill for here. If you are seriously interested [yes even if I join goons this is a real service] being paid for what I got burnt out doing???

Send me mail. I'll get back to you in a week. Eventually I'll stop bumping thread and onnly be checking mail.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.02 23:39:00 - [22]
 

pOSTING aS sEMI lEGDLEBE AS aLLOWED [ IGNORE] LIGITMANET. NO RISK FIRST VISTS!!! DESCITER. gOT TO LOSE???

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.02 23:42:00 - [23]
 

Much respect Ui, but me improtants.

Misanth
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE
Posted - 2009.07.02 23:43:00 - [24]
 

Reserved.

(for a small fee I'll rent it out)

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.02 23:54:00 - [25]
 

Originally by: Misanth
Reserved.

(for a small fee I'll rent it out)
k, trungint off troll is hard and i really don't want to wait a week for ur wonf safety

Misanth
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE
Posted - 2009.07.02 23:55:00 - [26]
 

Originally by: Jimmy Duce
Originally by: Misanth
Reserved.

(for a small fee I'll rent it out)
k, trungint off troll is hard and i really don't want to wait a week for ur wonf safety


Thanks, I appreciate that.

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.03 00:07:00 - [27]
 

Originally by: Misanth
Originally by: Jimmy Duce
Originally by: Misanth
Reserved.

(for a small fee I'll rent it out)
k, trungint off troll is hard and i really don't want to wait a week for ur wonf safety


Thanks, I appreciate that.
Trool completely off [see what I did? got my tell yet??] So yeah send me a mail. The counter point of winning even is how popular u become but if u send me a mail I'll scan it, improtant announcement makes this even more important [and funny!!!], but yeah mail > forum.If I forget cause of goonies or rancer hek yeah I said it [man which idiot lets their targets know aheard of time I mean they can easily afford GH or privateers and elite pvpers ...
mail

Misanth
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE
Posted - 2009.07.03 00:19:00 - [28]
 

Originally by: Jimmy Duce
Originally by: Misanth
Originally by: Jimmy Duce
Originally by: Misanth
Reserved.

(for a small fee I'll rent it out)
k, trungint off troll is hard and i really don't want to wait a week for ur wonf safety


Thanks, I appreciate that.
Trool completely off [see what I did? got my tell yet??] So yeah send me a mail. The counter point of winning even is how popular u become but if u send me a mail I'll scan it, improtant announcement makes this even more important [and funny!!!], but yeah mail > forum.If I forget cause of goonies or rancer hek yeah I said it [man which idiot lets their targets know aheard of time I mean they can easily afford GH or privateers and elite pvpers ...
mail


I just had a couple of beers. They were delicious. Want some?

Jimmy Duce
Chaotic Tranquility
Posted - 2009.07.03 00:24:00 - [29]
 

Originally by: Misanth
I just had a couple of beers. They were delicious. Want some?[/quote

You pass iskiesss!!!


 

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